1 . Meeting people is the first step to make friends. But how do you actually become friends with someone? Here are some useful tips.

1. Make small talk even if you don’t feel like it

Small talk can feel false and meaningless. But it does have a purpose. By making small talk, you show that you’re friendly and open to communicating. In that way, small talk helps you to make the first connection with potential new friends. If someone doesn’t make any small talk, we might assume that they don’t want to make friends with us, that they don’t like us, or that they’re in a bad mood.

2. Figure out what you might have in common

When you talk to someone new and realize that you have things in common, the conversation usually goes from stiff to fun and interesting. Therefore, make it a habit to find out if you have any mutual interests or something in common. You can do this by mentioning things that interest you and seeing how they react.

3. Don’t write people off until you know them

Don’t judge people too quickly. Try not to assume that they are shallow, boring, or that you have nothing to talk about. If everyone seems uninterested, it might be because you keep getting stuck in small talk. If you only make small talk, everyone sounds shallow.

4. Make people like being around you

When you try to make people like you, it will become easier for you to make friends. When you make sure that people like being around you, they will like you. If we are with someone with a positive experience, we like that person more.

6 . Have you ever received an invitation that you couldn’t accept? Do you struggle with how to decline without hurting someone’s feelings or causing conflict? Does it bother you to turn someone down? If the answer is yes to any of these questions, you’re not alone. In fact, this happens to most people at some time in their lives.     1     Here are some tips on how to turn down an invitation in the most polite way.

As soon as you know you will be unable to go, let the person know. Most events require planning and budgeting.     2     She needs to know whether or not you’ll be there. Ignoring the invitation shows that you don’t know proper etiquette (礼节), and you might be left off the guest list for her next party.

Always sincerely thank the person for inviting you and let her know that you’re honored that she’d think highly enough of you to send the invitation.

You don’t ever have to come up with false excuses for why you’re unable to go to the event, but you also don’t have to go into detail.     4     That should be enough. And remember that when you give reasons, keep your explanation short and to the point. Doing otherwise will make it sound like you’re just trying to make up excuses.

If the invitation is exclusive (独有的) to you, let the person know you’re unable to make it at the time she requested,     5    

7 . For lots of kids, toddlerhood(幼儿期)is an important time for friendship. Studies show that the earlier kids learn to form positive relationships, the better they are at relating to others as teenagers and adults. Playing together also helps these kids practice social behaviors, such as kindness, sharing, and cooperation.

Even so, how quickly your child develops into a social creature may also depend on his temperament. Some toddlers are very social, but others are shy. In addition, the way that toddlers demonstrate that they like other children is markedly different from what adults think of as expressions of friendship. Research at Ohio State University in Columbus found that a toddler’s way of saying “I like you” during play is likely to come in the form of copying a friend’s behavior.

This seemingly unusual way of demonstrating fondness can result in unpleasant behavior. Regardless of how much they like a playmate, they may still grab his toys, refuse to share, and get bossy. But experts say that this is a normal and necessary part of friendship for kids this age. Through play experiences, toddlers learn social rules. That’s why it’s so important to take an active role in your toddler’s social encounters by setting limits and offering frequent reminders of what they are. When you establish these guidelines, explain the reasons behind them.

Begin by helping your child learn sympathy (“Ben is crying. What’s making him so sad?”), then suggest how he could resolve the problem(“Maybe he would feel better if you let him play the ball.”). When your child shares or shows empathy(同理心)toward a friend, praise him(“Ben stopped crying! You made him feel better.”).

Another way to encourage health y social interaction is by encouraging kids to use words—not fists—to express how they feel. It’s also important to be mindful of how your child’s personality affects playtime. Kids are easy to get angry when they’re sleepy or hungry, so schedule playtime when they’re refreshed.

8 . We all feel lonely at some point, but long-term social loneliness can damage our mental and physical health. “Loneliness is a signal that you need human connection,” says Dr. Jeremy Nobel.     1    .

It’s easier to connect with people if you have shared the same ideas or experiences, so start paying attention to what’s on your mind.     2    . If you know what’s meaningful for you, it may lead you to an activity or creative idea that connects you to people.

When someone says make something, you can immediately say, “Well, I’m not Picasso. I don’t know how to do a fancy painting.” And, of course, you’re not! But the opportunities for creative expression are endless. You can plant a garden or try a dance move.     3    .

Share something about yourself. It doesn’t have to be the biggest or darkest part of your life, but just something you think other people might find interesting and convincing.     4    , putting yourself out there requires a bit of risk, and it’s another important step to real connection.

Whether it’s volunteering for a cause you believe in or just for fun, try to find others who share your interests. And if you follow your natural curiosities, you may find something new. Share your thoughts and feelings in creative ways with other people who have that interest.

9 . Friendships can enrich your life in many ways. Good friends teach you about yourself and challenge you to be better. They also have a positive impact on your health.     1    ?

●Friends encourage healthy behaviors.

One possible explanation for those health benefits is that friendships can help you make lifestyle changes that can have a direct impact on your well-being. For example, your friends can help you set and maintain goals to eat better and exercise more.

●Friends give you emotional support.

Research also shows that happiness is contagious(有感染力的)among friends. One study of high school students found that those who were depressed were twice as likely to recover if they had happy friends.     3    .

●Friends help build your confidence.

Everyone has self-doubts and insecurities every now and then.     4    . They’ll shine a light on just how amazing you are and how much you have to offer others.

●    5    .

Great friends have the power to mold(塑造)you into the best version of yourself. They see you and love you for who you truly are. They encourage you and push you to do better and be the person you want to be —your “ideal self”.

10 . Friendship is important in our life. If you and your friends are in conflict (冲突)and your friendship is coming to an end, it’s time to work through hurt feelings and misunderstandings.     1    .

Before you face a difficult conversation with a friend, stop and reflect (反思). Think of a specific moment.     2    . Use that memory as an inspiration to write down things you thank for about a friend. Beginning the communication repair from a place of gratitude and positive sides is going to make the conversation a lot more meaningful.

    3     Send more postcards, write more letters or send someone a book you think they would enjoy. In your letter, include why you think the relationship feels embarrassed-and why you want to repair it. You may realize your friend is going through something. You’ll begin the all-important practice of listening, before you even sit down to talk to each other.

The expert noted that friendships may require time to settle back into normal after the conflicts. People differ in how they deal with conflicts. Therefore, give a friendship some breathing room before trying again. That lasting uncomfortable feelings may require further attention.

Sometimes a friendship suffers due to a miscommunication. The experts encourage people not to let a single problem break up a friendship.     5    . Instead, it can be an opening to improve a friendship.