My favourite book, The Secret by Rhonda Byrne, talks about a formula called “SFF” which stands for “stopping finding fault”. I used to be a critical person and tried to find fault. I guess I somehow inherited this character from my father. Actually, many good qualities of my father are worth admiring except this.

My father is a person who constantly looks for mistakes in other people and he thinks no one is perfect in the world. His character created a negative atmosphere in my family. I was the same as my father, so I often felt angry, disappointed, depressed, and lonely in school.

After I had read my favourite book I began to seek “good things” in other people. It has completely changed my life. Now I feel happier, I have more friends, I have more trust in people, and I realize everyone has his own strength! Another important lesson I got from this book is that I should always behave myself in a positive manner. Let's admit that we sometimes complain about our situation. That's not good. Believe it or not, people don't like to listen to negative opinions.

One more valuable lesson I got from the book is that I should be a good listener. When I was younger, I only wanted people to pay whole attention to my words so that I could show them how important I was. I was very proud and would show off my achievements in school without considering others' feelings. I had very few friends and most people considered me as an arrogant person. Now, I find it much easier to make friends after making some changes!

I first began experiencing anxiety and depression at the age of 14, after being bullied (欺凌) at school for years. While at first anxiety and depression would come and go, it eventually became a constant part of my life.

I was so eager to find the solution to overcoming my anxiety and depression that I tried everything from when I was in college to graduate school: mood-changing medication, special teas, yoga, anything I read about in books, and advice given by doctors. Despite this, I still felt I hadn't even come close to managing the problem.

But one afternoon, my eyes fell upon an article in a magazine I was reading that talked about how dogs were able to help people with anxiety and depression. The very next day, I decided to get a dog — a corgi. When I brought my little corgi, Buddy, home, I didn't realize how much he would change my life. It didn't happen right away, however.

Once the “puppy excitement” went away, my anxiety and depression came back as usual. One morning, I woke up with those familiar feelings again. I didn't want to get out of bed. I turned to pull the covers back over my head and gave up. That was when I saw Buddy.

Buddy started jumping all over me, licking my face, letting me know that it was time to go outside. It was as if he were saying, “There's no time to be sad; the world is amazing!”

And for the first time in my life, on a day when my anxiety and depression were strong, I got out of bed. I put on my winter clothes and went for a walk in the snow with my new friend. I realized at that moment, walking down the street in winter, my life was changing. I really was a new girl.

Sure, I still have days when I feel down or anxious. But with Buddy by my side, I've finally learned how to manage these feelings and emotions.

Living life to its fullest

On the night of August 24, 2001, everything changed when my friend's car hit a wall with me inside. I lost most of my right leg, and I was left bleeding with several broken bones. At the hospital, although my body was weak, my mind was still very clear. I just kept telling myself to hold on. A week later, I made a deal with the doctors that once I could roll onto my side, I could leave. Two weeks later, I was allowed to go home.

Although I left the hospital, the fight was far from over. My left knee was badly injured, which resulted in different operations over the next few years.

And soon, more of my right leg had to be removed. This made it harder to wear my false leg, so I donated it to a nurse who couldn't afford one for herself. The joy of being able to provide this gift for someone else was greater than the happiness I felt on any day I was able to wear it myself.

People often tell me they're proud of me for staying strong. But in my mind, staying strong has always been my only choice. So, on the day I left the hospital, I made a promise to myself to always live life to the fullest. Now, I may not be able to do things the way everybody else does them, but still, I always find a way to do them. I soon settled into everyday life again, until one day I realized I wasn't living my life as fully as I wanted to.

After 13 years of thinking that I was confident, I had an unfamiliar feeling sweep over me. For the first time in my life, I was not only confident but I wanted to help those around me.

In 2014, I even started modeling. My dream is that one day a little girl will see me in a magazine and say, “Wow, she's beautiful, and she only has one leg. I could do that too someday, even though I have a disability.” My dream is simple: to inspire every man, woman, and child into knowing and believing that they are beautiful just the way they are.

If you feel at present that you don’t have enough friends in your life, one reason may be that you have let yourself become too busy to make time for the relationships you already have. Starting and keeping friendship requires effort and commitment.

Many of us let our lives become so busy with work and other responsibilities that we don’t get around to scheduling time for pleasure and renewal（叙旧）with the friends, relatives and acquaintances we already have.

Making the effort to call your friends more regularly and to accept more of their invitations you receive from others can improve your social life in a hurry!

Are there any people you could call right now and be sure to receive a pleasant welcome? Are there people that you could count onto help you in time of difficulty? Can you have close talks with them? Do you have fun when you are together? Are you happy to have them in your life?

If you haven’t seen much of them lately, is it because you have become too busy? Have you grown apart? Was there an argument?

If the main reason you haven’t been getting together with the people you already know is that   you have got too busy，take a good look at how you spend your time. Compare it with your real values and priorities（优先考虑的事）in life. Is your busy lifestyle really bringing you the quality of life that you want?

If you have become too busy for friends, why has this happened? Are you seeking material toys in your life at the expense of relationships with other human beings? Have you allowed your time to be over spent because you never say “No” to anyone? Do you insist on doing things yourself that could be appointed to others? If so, why? Do you believe that everything depends on you?

Examine whether the way you are now spending your time accurately reflects your deepest values and priorities. Make sure that you schedule adequate time for the things that are truly most important to you.

If you really want to keep friends in your life, make a space in your schedule, and a space in your heart for them.