【推荐2】“A bird with a broken wing will never fly as high. ” I’m sure T. J,   Ware was made to feel this way almost every day in school.

By high school, T, J. was the most celebrated troublemaker in his town. Teachers literally cringed when they saw his name posted on their classroom lists.

I met T. J. for the first time when all the students at school were attending ACE training.   At first, he showed no interest in the discussion.   But slowly, the interactive games drew him in.   T. J.   had some brilliant thoughts on those situations, which were welcomed by his group.   By the end of the activity, the other students on the team were impressed with his concern and ideas and elected T. J.   co-chairman of the team.

When T. J. showed up at school on Monday morning, a group of teachers were expressing their disagreements to the school principal about his being elected co-chairman. The principal reminded them that the purpose of the program was to uncover any positive feeling and strengthen its practice until true change can take place. The teachers left the meeting, firmly convinced that failure was unavoidable.

Two weeks later, T. J.   and his friends led a group of 70 students to collect food   They collected a school record: 2,854 cans of food in just two hours.   The local newspaper covered the event with a full-page article the next day. That newspaper story was posted on the main bulletin board at school, where everyone could see it.   

T. J. ,s picture was up there for doing something great.

T. J. started showing up at school every day and answered questions from teachers for the first time.   The event he started now yields 9,000 cans of food in one day, taking care of 70 percent of the need for food for one year.

T, J. reminds us that a bird with a broken wing only needs mending.   But once it has healed, it can fly higher than the rest.   T. J.   got a job.   He became productive.   He is flying quite nicely these days.

【推荐3】Our chronotype(生理时钟) is how our body reacts to the time of a day. It determines whether we’re early birds or night owls.     1    

▲ Morning people are the early birds. They are awake and operate at peak efficiency in the morning, but usually they can’t stay up for the late news.

▲ Day people sleep a little later and are the most effective in the afternoon.

▲ Night owls sleep as late as possible and are up well past nightfall, into the early hours of the morning.

    2     Babies and young children are typically early risers. Adolescents are more likely day chronotypes. Teens and young adults are definitely night owls, sleeping as late as possible and staying up late. As we grow older, we switch back toward day or morning people.

Our reaction to each of day parts is driven by our internal(内部的) clock. A person’s internal clock is usually a 24-hour clock and it’s tied to earth’s 24-hour cycle of day and night. Some people’s cycle is a little shorter, so they are usually early birds.     3    

Our bodies really want us to follow the natural rhythms of the earth’s rotation(旋转), wake up when it’s light and go to bed when it’s dark.     4     People with overnight shifts can have problems adjusting. It can be done, but changes need to be gradual.

There are old sayings “The early bird catches the worm.” and “Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.”     5     That doesn’t mean being a night owl is bad for you, but it takes extra effort to stay healthy when your body wants to sleep in and stay up late.

【推荐1】Since the Second World War, there has been an obvious trend, especially among the growing group of college students, toward early marriage. Many youths begin dating in the first stages of adolescence, ''go steady'' through high school, and marry before their formal education has been completed. In some quarters, there is much shaking of graying heads over the ways of rebellious youth. However, emotional maturity does not grow with age; it does not arrive automatically at twenty-one or twenty-five. Some achieve it surprisingly early, while others never do, even in three-score years and ten.

Many students are marrying as an escape, not only from an unsatisfying home life, but also from their own personal problems of isolation and loneliness. However, any marriage entered into as an escape cannot prove entirely successful. The sad fact is that marriage seldom solves one's problems; more often, it merely worsens them. Furthermore, it is doubtful whether the home is capable of carrying all that the young are seeking to put into it; one might say that they are abandoning one idol only to worship another. Young people correctly understand that their parents are wrong in believing that success is the ultimate good, but they themselves are wrong in believing that they have found the true center of life's meaning. Their expectations of marriage are essentially unrealistic and therefore incapable of fulfillment. They want too much, and tragic disillusionment (幻想破灭) is often bound to follow.

Shall we, then, join the chorus of those against early marriages? One cannot generalize: all early marriages are not bad any more than all later ones are good. Satisfactory marriages are determined not by how old one is, but by the emotional maturity of the partners. Therefore, each case must be judged on its own merits. If the early marriage is not an escape, if it is entered into with relatively few illusions or false expectations, and if it is economically practicable, why not? Good marriages can be made from sixteen to sixty, and so can bad ones.

【推荐2】It is rightly said that one can share any secret with a true friend. He may know your deepest fears and weaknesses and yet will never take advantage of you. However, keeping a friend’s secrets to yourself and not telling the world is what makes the bond grow strong and last forever. You need to develop trust and mutual understanding before you start sharing secrets with each other. With friends, secret talks never seem to end and it can get really amusing to know what has been going on in your friend’s mind.

There is a certain time in life especially from the teenage years when one starts having a personal periphery in life and parents are excluded from it. It is because there are certain things that they can’t understand and we can’t discuss with them. That is when friends become the best secret sharers. They are the ones to whom one reveals one’s feelings and best kept secrets.

It is a general belief that only girls share secrets. But boys have their own secrets that they discuss with only closest friends. The secret talks can range from relationships, talks about fights with parents, secret activities and anything that is not supposed to be known to others! If you think secrets are limited to only teenagers, get your facts right! Secrets can be shared at any age and there is no hard and fast rule that secrets are shared only among youngsters.

Sharing secrets with a friend is not just fun, but it also helps to develop a lasting trust in one another. Sometimes, sharing secrets will tell you more about the person. You will come to know whether your friend is reliable and trustworthy and whether it is worth sharing your secrets with them. You can call it a test of friendship.

【推荐3】When going through major life changes, like changing careers, I would change the people with whom I spent the most time. We’ve all gone through periods when the people in our lives have changed—graduation, moving to a new city, getting a new job, joining a new club, etc. I don’t think I need to convince you just how much influence other people can have over your identity. If you’ve ever experienced a major switch in your people environment, then you know that you change as well.

Most people don’t make these choices consciously though. You might consciously decide to spend more time with a certain friend, or you may ask someone out on a date to begin a new relationship. But few people choose their existing friendships deliberately.

There’s no “getting rid of people”. People are always dropping into and out of each other’s lives. Associations grow into friendships, and friendships fade into associations. You don’t get rid of anyone. The truth is that in order to make room for new people and new experiences, you may need to loosen up some of your existing connections.

What about loyalty? Shouldn’t you always be loyal to your friends? Once you have a close friend, even if their influence on you is slightly harmful, shouldn’t you stick by them?

Loyalty to a friend sometimes means having to let go. It means being loyal to their highest and best as well. If someone is destroying his health by smoking, for example, you aren’t showing loyalty by smoking right along with him. True loyally sometimes requires that you break damaging connections, get yourself back on solid ground, and then decide what you can really do to help your friend.

It can take a lot of courage to tell someone, “I’m sorry, but I can’t have you in my life anymore." But even though this might seem like a selfish act at times, it’s often the best thing for the other person too. If a relationship is holding you back in some way, understand that it is also hurting the other person. For example, if you work for a violent boss, your acceptance of that situation is considered to be silent approval, encouraging your boss to continue to behave violently.

【推荐1】What Are the Roots of Your Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem is a person’s subjective assessment of his or her worth to himself or herself. Self-esteem covers various beliefs about oneself (such as “I’m a failure,” and “I’m beautiful”) as well as physiological states, including sadness, joy, and shame. The more we believe that we are worthy of happiness and good things in life, the more self-fulfilled we will be.When we don’t believe that we are worthy of these things, our ability to enjoy them can suffer.     1    

Healthy self-esteem as an adult can be a gift that you are given in your childhood. It is a blessing that most people overlook. There are so many ways that adults with high self-esteem were supported as children that resulted in them having high self-esteem. For instance, they were praised for what they had achieved.     2    They likely experienced affection and were given enough attention. It is also possible that they excelled in studies or in sports and were admired for it by peers.

    3     As children, many of these people were criticized harshly, yelled at, or abused in one way or another. There is also a high chance that they were given little to no attention by the adults who were supposed to care for them. In some cases, adults with poor self-esteem were often ridiculed for their shortcomings or bullied by peers.

It is common that these adults also were made to feel that in order to be appreciated they needed to be perfect.     4     There are people who are obsessed with their careers or hobbies because in their mind they need to tie their worthiness to something tangible. Oftentimes these people have to pretend to be something they are not just to get approval.

How you feel about yourself impacts how you live your life. People with high self-esteem tend to have better relationships than those with low self-esteem.     5     So if you struggle to reach out for assistance it could be rooted in your low self-esteem.

People with high self-esteem are better equipped at achieving their life goals because they have faith in themselves. They face failure too but they understand that failure or success doesn’t define them. Having high self-esteem allows you to accept yourself for who you are. Flaws and strengths, you know that these make up the essence of who you are.

Why you should work on your self-esteem

Since self-esteem is connected to how we perform in various areas of our lives, it is important to work on it. To build better relationships, careers, and health and achieve goals, you need to first understand that you are worthy of all those things.

That understanding comes from building high self-esteem. If you had a terrible childhood, it doesn’t mean you are doomed. You just have to work a little harder to build high self-esteem and it is possible. However, it isn’t easy.

There are many resources out there that can help you with simple exercises that you can do on a daily basis to achieve this. If you are struggling in many areas of your life, take a step back and evaluate the relationship you have with yourself.

How do you talk to yourself? How do you treat yourself? What do you think of yourself? Do you feel worthy of receiving good in your life or do you feel bad about the good things that happen to you? If you find yourself experiencing something good and you tell yourself “I don’t deserve this” or “I didn’t work hard enough for this,” you may have low self-esteem. And when you have that kind of negative self-talk, you self-sabotage.

【推荐2】A warm car and a long journey means that staying hydrated(有水的)is essential for all the family, so keep your drinks within easy reach with a holder.    1    That is, you can keep everything in one place, rather than having to search through endless pockets and bags.

One of the keys to a successful road trip is having enough space to be comfortable.    2    A roof box means there’s plenty of safe, dry storage for bags and cases, without a tower of belongings piled on the knees of everyone on the back seat.

Kids are messy and adults aren’t always much better.    3    Keep it clean and tidy when you’re on the move.

Sunshades(遮阳蓬)are a must for long journeys with children.    4    Many are transparent (透明的)enough for your children to still be able to see the world outside.

If tiredness hits, help little passengers to catch 40 winks and wake up refreshed with a supportive travel pillow.         5    .

Make sure journeys aren’t any longer (or more stressful) than they need to be. It’ll get you where you want to go without any needless routes or arguing over directions.

【推荐3】If the West has the apple, the East has the king of fruits: the mighty mango. Called “aam” in Hindi, Urdu and Punjabi, this tropical fruit traces its origins to South Asia. Urdu and Hindi literature are filled with references to this fruit that once filled the kitchens and gardens of emperors.

Everyone is crazy about mangoes during the summer months in South Asia. City streets in India are lined with vendors (小贩) selling all varieties of mangoes. Young and old bargain for better prices, mangoes are sent as gifts, restaurants have special mango menu items and the fruit becomes a gesture of goodwill between India and Pakistan, with the choicest varieties sent across the border to celebrate each country’s independence days.

South Asians all over the world await mango season. South Asian stores receive shipments of the fruit, though they are limited in quality and quantity. Each year, I savor (品尝) my mangoes, though I’m saddened that popular varieties aren’t easily available in Vancouver.

Mango memories take me back to the city I was born in: Rourkela in the eastern part of India. In late March, just as the days would start to become hot, I remember mango trees blooming with their fresh fragrance in the breeze as we biked to school. Come April, the tees would start bearing fruit. I remember the thrill of sneaking out to collect raw mangoes, climbing onto the roof of our quarters and eating them with pink salt and powdered red chilies (红辣椒粉) alongside my best friend.

Mango stories from my childhood are endless. But this summer in Vancouver, tired from the pandemic, I can’t help but remember my sweet mango memories. I realize that I need to wander the streets of my home country, to feel the intense heat of the summer months and soak in the country of my birth.

Instead, I am in a semi-lockdown state savoring mangoes, enjoying those I can find in Canada but missing the Indian varieties. This year, the mighty mango has become a symbol of the sense of loss that each one of us is feeling.