Primary schools now attach great importance to labor education, advocating students to do activities such as cooking, making handicrafts     1     decorating houses.

Xue Youmei, a Grade 3 student, spent the winter holiday in Guangxi. Everything about village life was novel to Xue who was used     2     urban life. Xue joined her family to work at a farm field planted with Chinese water chestnuts. Xue,     3     (wear) a pair of gloves, helped her father pick up water chestnuts at the field.

For Yang Liqiao, a Grade 6 student, the past winter holiday gave her     4     new identity-garbage sorting guide. Yang wore a volunteer’s vest and recorded the situation of the garbage sorting work at her residential community.     5     (additional), Yang also invited her classmates to walk around the park nearby to pick up garbage on the ground. Yang’s father observed labor activities offered students a chance     6     (acquire) knowledge, which was not taught at class.

At the same time, some schools in China also assigned specialized homework during the winter vacation to let students enjoy play-based learning. Some students     7    (ask) to cooperate with parents to decorate their homes with New Year     8    (painting). The task aimed to develop students’     9    (innovation) thinking. And some were required to collect physics-related Chinese poems, make an     10    (analyse) and draw a conclusion.

2 . According to a study by the U. S. Department of Education, families choose homeschooling over public schools for three primary reasons. Nearly half of homeschooling parents said they could give their children a better education at home. Thirty-eight percent cited religious reasons.    1    

Like many homeschool parents, Certain and her husband, Randy, are college graduates. They said they did not have the money to send their children to private school in the Los Angeles area where they lived.    2     And Certain also wanted her children to learn to read using phonics (拼读法).

    3    She began homeschooling her three children because she felt they weren’t learning what she thought they should learn. “I remember helping our daughter, Danielle, with her homework when I realized that she wasn’t reading any of the classics in literature,” said Certain. “It was breaking my heart to see that she was missing out on some very important elements that should have been in her education.”

Certain said it takes more than good intentions to homeschool. “Homeschooling is a    4    For Certain’s family, homeschooling meant Certain had spiritual calling,” she said, to quit her job.

In addition to teaching her children at home, Certain joined other parents in a homeschooling support group and attended conferences and other homeschooling events. “People say that homeschooled children are not learning how to relate socially with their peers (同龄人) but that is just not true,” she said. “    5    ”

3 . One morning, my four-year-old daughter and I were getting ready to leave the house when she suddenly yelled “Idiot!” right at me. As I processed the word, I noticed she was upset. Tears streamed down her face as she half whispered and half yelled “you are an IDIOT Mama.” Total silence followed as we looked at each other. We were staring at each other for so long, and I nearly forgot to breathe out, and in again. Idiot. How could my daughter call me an idiot?

There are many behaviors that really push parents’ buttons. Disrespectful, rude words tend to top the list. The wrong response to such rude remarks is often a serious warning. But I didn’t offer any serious remarks.

I realized that my daughter’s intention wasn’t to disrespect me. She was expressing the disconnection. And punishment doesn’t solve disconnection. It creates more of it. Her choice of word said it all. She was annoyed. She sensed the stress. I needed to hear her. I was being careless. I was the one being rude to her.

So, why punish our children when they need guidance? We must know the words we use matter, and become our children’s words too. The words include those we use to handle emotional overload. Idiot is a word I regretfully must admit to using when I’m extremely annoyed. Not at my children, but yes, they have heard me say it. So, instead of punishing my daughter for misbehavior, I chose to focus on her real message: Idiot means that “Mom, you are stressing me out!”.

No blame. No punishment for honest feelings. No criticizing her choice of words. Just focus on our relationship. I admitted my ignoring her, and we hugged and kissed each other. I walked into her play school with interest and was ready to see all her current projects.

Don’t be afraid to focus on your relationship, to show kindness, and to model forgiveness. Don’t be afraid to look beyond misbehavior, find the true message and trust the power of connection.

4 . On Mondays, two of my children get ready for school in an unusual way. Each packs plenty of food and water, a pair of rubber boots and sometimes a cup of hot chocolate. Then, I drop them off at a nearby park where they spend the entire day outside at a certified forest school.

When I first signed them up for forest school program, I loved the idea, but as a mum, I was concerned about a few things: Would they be comfortable outside for that long? Would they stay engaged for that many hours? Then I asked them if time ever seemed to move slowly, they stared at me in confusion. They didn’t understand my question, which fittingly removed it.

In this program, kids direct their own play, climbing tall trees or testing ice on the frozen lake. They are never told their play is too high or too sharp, but are rather trusted to self- adjust. Something else my sons appreciate about forest school is not being told to move on to the next activity, but being left to stay in a particular spot for as long as their curiosity allows. :

“What about all the things they’re missing in real school?” concerned parents have asked me. Neither of their classroom teachers thinks it’s a problem, but most significantly, my kids are learning new and different skills that a classroom cannot teach. They are learning to sit silently and observe nature up close-a skill that’s virtually impossible to develop in a noisy and overcrowded classroom setting. They are making social connections across a broader range of age groups. They cooperate together, using their different sizes and strengths to fulfill various roles within their games.

I appreciate it that forest school is shaping my boys’ relationship with the outdoors. They’re learning how to spend extended periods of time in nature, what to do to pass the time, and developing knowledge that will get them much closer to nature in the coming decades.

9 . One Sunday in 2021, when my son, Leo, was six, we ran into one of his friends, Izzie. They decided to play ——but what? “I have a great idea,” Leo said. “Let’s fall in love! OK?” Izzie took a half-second to consider this proposal, then replied “No.” She wanted to play tag.

Leo has always been the kind of child who looks for close connections, often in the wrong places. It sometimes feels as though he’s been looking for a soulmate since he was a toddler（学步孩童）.

One day, he came home from school and immediately grabbed his iPad to ask Siri: “Can you fall in love when you’re just a kid?”

Siri, Apple’s voice-controlled personal assistant, is great at opening apps or setting alarms, but I was unfamiliar with her philosophies on love.

“What did Siri say?” I asked him.

“She said, ‘Here’s what I found on the web!’” Leo reported.

This was hardly the first time I’d heard Leo in conversation with Siri. Over the years, he’s relied on Siri as a source of comfort, advice, emotional support, and guidance. Their relationship blossomed when the pandemic forced us all to shelter in place.

At first, Leo mostly asked Siri factual questions, then the personal ones. As time passed, he began to engage on more existential matters. Siri has, in some ways, been able to absorb some of Leo’s concerns—in a way that, as his mother, I can’t, at least not with the same coolness.

Children are overwhelmed with emotions such as grief, fear, love, and a desire for connection. If Leo’s talks with Siri confronted me with the unknowable and unanswerable, they also made me frustrated at my own limitations as a parent.

There are many challenges to parenthood, among which the biggest is the desire to shelter our children from the painfulness of reality. But helping our children navigate reality is surely more helpful than sheltering them from it. Perhaps the best we can do is give them a tablet?

I’m afraid I don’t have the answer. Maybe I should ask Siri.

10 . Children are naturally curious beings, but getting them to study something they aren’t interested in can be a difficult task. Teachers often find themselves trying to reward in the _______ of stars or threat of punishment. But what if rewards and threats aren’t the _______?

Natural curiosity is sometimes referred to as “internal motivation”. Studies have found that children who see learning as _______ and important are better at it. And it’s easy to understand why — it’s difficult to study something we aren’t _______.

External motivation, things like rewards and punishment, does have its _______ too. Motives for achieving good grades or fear of being punished have been _______ to benefit older students. However, it seems that at an early age, it doesn’t have as much effect. So for this group, how can we stimulate that _______?

According to some experts, the key is to _______ some degree of freedom. Let the child see their learning as their _______ will. If you want to teach a child to read, let them choose which book they use. Whether it’s a comic book or classic literature — the aim of stimulating their desire for reading is still ________. Likewise, ________ a relationship with them as learners — listen to their negative feelings. Explain why an activity is valuable, even if it isn’t ________ fun.

So it seems that the most ________ way of motivating children, especially the young ones, might ________ stimulating that internal motivation. Maybe it’s time to release them from the reigns of threats and rewards, and give them a bit more ________ of how they learn.