1 . For 85 years, the Harvard Study of Adult Development has tracked an original group of 724 men and more than 1,300 of their male and female descendants (后代) over three generations, asking thousands of questions and taking hundreds of measurements to find out what really keeps people healthy and happy.
Through all the years of studying these lives, one crucial factor stands out for the consistency and power of its bond to physical health, mental health and longevity: good relationships.
In 2008, researchers telephoned the wives and husbands of Harvard Study couples in their 80s every night for eight nights. Researchers spoke to each partner separately and asked them a series of questions about their days.
On days when these men and women spent more time in the company of others, they were happier. Like most older people, those in the Harvard Study experienced day-to-day rises and falls in their levels of physical pain and health difficulties. But researchers found that the people who were in more satisfying relationships were cushioned (缓冲) somewhat from these ups and downs of mood—their happiness did not decline as much on the days when they had more pain. Simply put, their happy marriages seemed to have a protective effect.
Elizabeth Gillespie, a therapist of couples, stated that although most of us found that our experience of relationships might be hard, and at times, impossible, it is essential to our well-being.
Today we live in much more complicated environments, so meeting our social needs presents different challenges. We might be sitting on a gold mine of vitality that we are not paying attention to, because it is hidden by the shiny appeal of smartphones or pushed to the side by work demands.
1. What’s the purpose of the Harvard Study of Adult Development?A.To study their lives over three generations. |
B.To reveal the secret to health and well-being. |
C.To track the descendants of an original group. |
D.To study the relationship between health and happiness. |
A.By working with other researchers. |
B.By tracking specific groups of people. |
C.By helping participants with social difficulties. |
D.By comparing the results from different people. |
A.To provide evidence for the bond of health and longevity. |
B.To introduce the concept of physical pain and health difficulties. |
C.To show the negative impact of unhappy marriages on older people’s mood. |
D.To support the positive impact of satisfying relationships on people’s lives. |
A.Having good social connections. |
B.Declining pains and difficulties. |
C.Overcoming ups and downs of mood. |
D.Experiencing rises and falls of physical health. |
2 . Have you ever wondered why different people react differently to the things you say and do? Maybe you told your parents a story that made them laugh, but found that the same story was upsetting to the kids at school. What caused them to react so differently?
Boundaries are the cut-off point between what a person finds funny and charming, and what they find hurtful and inappropriate.
While many people won’t tell you directly that you’ve made them uncomfortable, some people will.
A.You aren’t sure of a person’s boundaries. |
B.Different people have different boundaries. |
C.The gateway to a healthy relationship is boundaries. |
D.They may tell you that you’re standing too close to them. |
E.Pay attention to the way they react to your ideas and jokes. |
F.A person tends to tell you directly if you’ve made a mistake. |
G.The answer has something to do with a tricky concept called boundaries. |
3 . How to Deal with a Colleague who Keeps Challenging Your Views
It can be difficult to develop an environment of teamwork when you continually run up against a colleague who challenges your views.
If a co-worker habitually challenges your ideas in a group discussion in a confrontational manner, don’t engage him or get into an argument. Pause for a moment, look the colleague in the eye.
There’s a time and place for everything, including professional disagreements. If a colleague interrupts you or talks over you in an effort to contradict your point or insert (插入) his own opinion, gently remind him that you still have the floor. If the colleague is challenging something you say before you have a chance to address the point, note that as well.
Agree to respect each other.If a particular colleague has a long history of disagreeing with you, you might be able to anticipate his arguments or objections. Prepare rebuttals to address anything your colleague might throw at you.
A.Hold your ground. |
B.Ask for peace-making. |
C.This will help you support your own arguments. |
D.And ask him in a calm voice to repeat what he said. |
E.Here are the ways to deal with colleagues of this kind. |
F.Just find ways to make peace and communicate with your colleague. |
G.The bottom line is, colleagues are not going to agree with each other all the time. |
4 . Do you have a hard time saying“no”? If “yes” rules your life and “no” doesn’t exist, here are some tips for you to say “no” without feeling bad.
Switch out “no” for “later”If you’re just starting out, you don’t have to jump straight to “no”.
Sometimes, invites or requests happen naturally and in person, requiring an answer immediately.
Offering an excuse may seem polite to decline a request, but it sets you up for an awkward situation. No matter what excuse you offer, people who are determined to get you to say “yes” will come up with a way to reel (卷轴) you in.
If the person asking you for something is someone who you want to maintain a positive relationship with, you can decrease the impact of your “no” by offering an alternative.
A.Don’t offer an explanation |
B.Don’t say “yes” to others easily |
C.Saying “no”at once can be tough |
D.But noisy places with many people aren’t your choices |
E.So it would be useful to rehearse your “no” in advance |
F.Being frank with people by saying “no” doesn’t mean rude |
G.The goal is to find a common ground and reach an agreement |
5 . I heard a story recently about a friend’s former boss. When employees would go into this person’s office to discuss something like a pay rise or promotion, the boss had a habit of greeting their request with silence. Quiet, tense seconds went slowly by, and they’d often leave, willing to take a pay cut or demotion (降职) — anything to end the terrible silence.
Embarrassing silences can be unbearable. In 2017, a study found that silence in a talk starts to be unbearable after about four seconds. There’s so much uncertainty in the air as those silent seconds went slowly by. Did I say something wrong? Does this person hate me? Am I going to get fired? But it’s worth remembering that if you don’t know what to say or do, there is always the choice to do nothing. Uncomfortable silences aren’t necessarily a bad thing, depending on how you use them.
For example, Katie Donovan is a supporter of the awkward-silence negotiating (谈判) technique. As she said, “The first step is to be silent or shut up!” If, for example, you are offered a starting salary of $40,000 when you know that the median salary for this position is $48,000, you can say something like this, “Thank you for the offer. I’m a little surprised about the salary, though. Based on my research I would have expected it to be in the $50,000 range.”
It’s a good start; there is no phrase more quietly deadly in the business world than “I’m a little surprised”. But it only works if you say this — and then say nothing. During this pause, Donovan explains, the hiring manager is likely to try to work out how serious you are and how much more to offer. “Remember,” Donovan writes, “the hiring manager most likely will increase the salary during the meeting.”
1. What would the employees often do when they met with the boss’s silence?A.Keep silent. | B.Get angry. | C.Fight back. | D.Give in. |
A.It is a basic part of communication. |
B.It gives people time for themselves. |
C.You don’t have to break it all the time. |
D.The meaning of it varies among people. |
A.Average. | B.Highest. |
C.Final. | D.Starting. |
A.Give up your request. | B.Keep silent for a while. |
C.Avoid making eye contact. | D.Continue to give your reasons. |
6 . Throughout history — and probably in your own life — you’ve seen examples of good and bad leaders. They can lift you up or drag you down, praise a group effort or promote themselves.
Leadership is said to be an art.
Be transparent with your team
The higher up you go, the more secrecy there is.
Being a leader isn’t just about checking off tasks and evaluating your team’s performance. Leaders should also make it their job to understand their teams as a whole, understand the people on their team as individuals, and put them in the right positions.
Seek guidance
A.Add value to your team |
B.Study how your team works |
C.But you can break that cycle of secrecy |
D.It’s not something everyone can do well |
E.Most leaders are not trained to be leaders |
F.Put yourself in the position to do the kind of work you love |
G.In short, leaders are often the difference between a great job and a terrible one |
7 . How do you express gratitude in your everyday life? For me, it sometimes feels worrying: hand-writing hundreds of thank you cards after an anniversary, or making sure to eat every last bite on my plate so my grandma wouldn’t think I was ungrateful for the meal.
Start a gratitude journal or write a letter. Make it a habit to put down the things that you’re thankful for.
Bear in mind the difference between saying “thanks to” and “thanks for”. Being grateful “for” something can be a little unclear or general.
A.Stretch your gratitude muscle. |
B.Notice the world surrounding you. |
C.Better still, deliver it in person and read it to them. |
D.A habitual gratitude journal will certainly benefit us. |
E.But experts say it doesn’t have to be that complicated. |
F.In fact, this habit reduces materialism and enhances generosity. |
G.Being grateful “to” something or someone implies a direct relationship. |
8 . Friendship is a practice of unconditional love, an opportunity to grow together towards fulfillment (成就), and a journey to unfold the most precious capacities of a human being.
Provide support and encouragement. Friendships aren’t all fun and games — they do require you put in some work. Say they’ve just quarreled with their parents or failed an exam. It’s your job to be there for them and provide them with whatever they need, starting with support and comfort.
Whatever the case, make it apparent that you’re rooting for them.
Seek the good of the other person. When we love another person, we seek the good of the other because we gladden their own happiness. Therefore, our seeking for the other person’s good is totally disinterested. We serve the other without expecting anything in return.
Accept the differences.
A.Be honest with each other. |
B.Acts of love are made for its own sake. |
C.Take responsibility of your own emotions. |
D.Additionally, it’s your duty to give them encouragement as needed. |
E.Human beings are relational beings, as everything we find in the nature. |
F.Therefore, developing friendship with other people is essential in our lives. |
G.Friendship doesn’t mean having the same interests, opinions and mindset as the other person. |
As humans, we
But what if you are struggling with shyness, social in security or have a long-standing difficulty
No matter
10 . In the winter you can be walking down a snow-covered city street, and opposite you someone is walking your way. There’s only enough room for one person to walk the thin path. So, who should make way?
It is not easy to be polite. Just think about it. You’re just as good as the next person.
Growing up in small-town Canada certainly helped me develop an attitude of politeness. In small towns, people generally know each other.
I’ve seen it happening in a mall when a door opened and two people tried to enter and leave at the same time. One of them held the door open and let the other pass. It cost nothing but the air was suddenly graced (增色) with smiles.
The situations and contexts for human interaction change, but what remains is the politeness that can be exercised. One person, or both, can choose to avoid potential conflict and make it into a polite gesture that will be appreciated.
A.Politeness often goes unnoticed. |
B.You can’t really get away with bad behavior. |
C.So why in the world should you stand aside? |
D.That’s the kind of civilization I want to live in. |
E.We can all make our own efforts to be more polite. |
F.This is actually where the possibility of politeness could occur. |
G.To be polite and behave properly are necessary when we encounter others. |