My first term at MIT was amazing-I was very motivated and got all A’s, with everything being passed. My second semester went pretty well, too, but I struggled very much in organic chemistry and ended up with a B. That was my first B ever, and though I was disappointed, I shook it off and tried to stay positive.

I was not even sure why I took organic chemistry, since I was interested in math. My parents were pressuring me to become a doctor like them so I guess I was trying to appease (安抚) them. But at the same time, I was desperately running away from them and their control. I was very conflicted and had no idea what I want to do in the future.

I had always excelled in math and so I chose to pursue that. I didn’t know it at that time,but my very sense of self-worth was based on the fact that I was good at math. But my third semester ended up with a D in math, and I didn’t do that well in my other classes, either.

I started skipping classes more and more; sleeping more and more. It seemed like all my friends were doing so well, getting some internship (实习) opportunities over the summers, while my parents made me fly home and stay with them every summer. The next semester I got 2 F’s.

In my fifth semester, I realized that I was awful at higher-level math and so I switched my major to computer science. I had lost all confidence in myself. I attended a few classes at the beginning of the semester, but after the first midterm exam, I completely stopped. My only relief was the dance team I was on. As expected, I failed all of my classes and had to withdraw (退学) from MIT.

Since I was forced to withdraw, I had no choice but to tell my parents.

I graduated with the highest honor, and now I am fortunate enough to have started my PhD.

Shopaholics

TV. The Internet. The mall. Everywhere we look, we see advertisements that urge us to buy. In today’s consumer society, we are under constant pressure to shop. Of course, most people only buy what they need and what they can afford. However, there are some people, called shopaholics, who can’t control their desire to spend money and buy things. This kind of addictive behaviour can lead large financial problems, family conflict, and deep unhappiness.

What are the symptoms of a shopaholic? People with this problem often spend hours and hours shopping on the Internet or at the mall. Their closets are full of clothing and jewelry that they have never worn, with the price tags still on them. Their homes may be packed with shopping bags and boxes that they bought but never used. Many shopaholics are aware of their own problems, but when they go to a store, they simply can’t resist the urge to buy. Some of them are ashamed of their weakness and try to hide it by storing their purchases in places like the attic (阁楼), where others won’t see them.

Psychologists suggest there are several reasons for a shopping addiction. For some people, it is a way of relieving stress. For others, shopping is a way to fight loneliness or depression. For people with low self-esteem, shopping can be a way that they prove their self-worth. Sometimes the problem develops out of boredom. It becomes a replacement for other hobbies and interests, and it helps pass the time. Although shopping can temporarily make people feel good, they often experience feelings of shame and guilt later.

When shopping habits get out of control, people need professional help. They can either see a counselor (顾问) or join an organisation such as Shopaholics Anonymous. Groups like this try to help people understand the reasons for their addiction and learn how to control the urge to shop. Their goal is to help people find ways to fulfill themselves that do not lead to serious debt and troubled lives.