2 . Nature has developed the emotional state we call anger to help us stay alive. Anger energizes us to prepare us for action. It can be used either in productive ways or just the opposite. When we feel energized by anger, we might ask ourselves how we put this energy to the most productive use.
Perhaps the most helpful thing to remember about anger is that it is a secondary emotion. A primary feeling is what is felt immediately before we feel angry. We might first feel afraid, attacked, offended, trapped, or disrespected. If any of these feelings are intense enough, we think of the emotion as anger. Generally speaking, secondary feelings do not identify the unmet emotional need. When all I can say is “I feel angry”, neither I nor any one else knows what would help me feel better. A helpful technique, then, is to always identify the primary emotion.
Assume someone wants us to do something we prefer not to do. At first we feel a little pressured, but not enough to get angry. When they keep pushing us, we begin to get irritated. If they continue, we get angry. Such anger damages relationships.
If we feel angry, it is evident that we feel strongly about something. Instead of saying, “I can’t believe how irresponsible she is. What a cold-hearted, evil witch she is.” A more productive response is: “Am I really upset by this? Why does it bother me so much? What specifically am I feeling?” From the answers, we can decide to pick the best one to calm the anger. As soon as we “upshift” and begin to think about our options and their consequences, we start to feel more in control and less threatened. We get out of the automatic stimulus-response mode and realize that we have choices.
There is a quote from Victor Frankl that goes like this: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space lie our growth and freedom.”
1. What’s the author’s attitude towards anger?
| A．Favorable. | B．Neutral. | C．Doubtful. | D．Negative. |
2. What can we know about anger?
| A．It reflects one’s intense feeling. | B．It refers to a minor emotion. |
| C．It can identify emotional need. | D．It surely causes a violent reaction. |
3. What does Paragraph 4 mainly deal with?
| A．What questions we ask about anger. | B．How we respond to the anger. |
| C．How we develop growth and freedom. | D．When we consider the consequence. |
4. What is the text mainly about?
| A．Ways to know about anger. | B．Reasons to arouse anger. |
| C．Managing anger in a good way. | D．Calming anger at the right time. |
