1 . It was 6 a.m. as I got on the train, ending my work one cold morning and I was lucky to get a seat. At that time of the morning, my eyes were not fully focused and at times I was half asleep. During that time the train was usually filled with construction workers heading out to start their work. On that particular morning I found myself drawn on the shoes of men sitting about 10 seats across from me.

I sat examining the shoes of men. Men from different walks of life, holding different jobs, thinking different thoughts, living different lives and despite what they did and how they looked, they all had something in common. They were all of the working class trying to achieve their dreams.

One day each of those men has to visit a shoe store to buy a new pair of shoes, a type that fits their working needs. For a short time those shoes look so good. Then one day they lose their shine; they no longer look as good, but guess what? The shoes feel right. Feet have found their own home within the comfort of those shoes.

If those shoes could talk, what kind of a tale do you think they would tell? If your shoes could talk, what do you think they would say about you? Would the story be about a journey filled with joy and fun? Or would the story be one filled with disappointment and regret?

We choose the shoes. Where we take them and when and how we wear them are up to us.

2 . I have been adopted by an American family since I was fifteen months old. Growing up in the second-whitest county in California, I had little interest in my ________ as an adopted Chinese American. After I moved to Tucson, my curiosity about my identities ________ as I was exposed to a larger Chinese population there.

During my four years at Northern Arizona University (NAU), I took two years of ________ language courses, which was a major marker in my adventure to ________ myself.

Through my class, I was introduced to the NAU Chinese culture club, where I ________ my knowledge of Chinese culture and connected with international students from China and students who were deeply ________ Chinese culture.

Then I had an opportunity to study abroad in Hong Kong for a year. Surrounded by mainly people who looked like me, I did not feel like I ________ as I usually do in the US. I became ________ connected to Hong Kong and its history, ________ and people. The experience ________ me to find beauty and ________ in the complexities (难题) of holding many identities.

After returning from my ________ abroad, I started to volunteer at the Education Abroad Office at NAU. I ________ my experience and encouraged other NAU students to go abroad, as it was such a ________ experience and enabled me to better understand myself. I’m ________ to call myself an adopted Chinese American.

3 . The Greek philosopher Heraclitus once said that you can’t step into the same river twice, for you aren’t the same person at each visit and the water is ever flowing. It is a powerful way to show the reality that everything is always changing. Yet so many people have unpleasant relationships with change. We resist it or attempt to control it, the result of which is almost always some combination of stress, anxiety, and burnout. It doesn’t have to be that way.

No doubt, change can, and often does, hurt; but with the right mindset, it can also be a force for growth. A concept called allostasis can help. Developed in the late 1980s by neuroscientist Peter Sterling and biologist Joseph Eyer, allostasis is based on the idea that rather than being rigid, our healthy baseline is a moving target. Allostasis is defined as “stability through change”—the way to stay stable through the process of change is by changing.

From neuroscience to pain science and psychology, allostasis has become the dominant model for understanding change in the scientific community. The brain is at its best when it is constantly rewiring itself and making new connections. Overcoming pain is not about resistance or trying to get back to where you were but about balancing acceptance with problem-solving and moving forward to normal.

The time to start practicing is now. Over the past few years, the river of change has been flowing, and it shows no signs of letting up. Our ability to work with these changes is directly related to our life satisfaction. Given all this, simply creating a stable expectancy around change goes a long way. So does realizing that the allostasis mindset doesn’t ask us to do nothing. Rather, it asks us to partake in change by focusing on what we can control and trying to let go of what we can’t. When I catch myself resisting change, in my head I say the following: “This is what is happening right now. I’m doing the best that I can. What, if any, skillful actions can I take?” Do this repeatedly and finally you start to get better at it.

To thrive in our lifetime — and not just survive —we need to transform our relationship with change, leaving behind rigidity and resistance. We are always shaping and being shaped by change, often at the very same time.

4 . “The new normal” is one of those phrases that can accurately apply to a wide variety of life situations, including a medical diagnosis, death or change in life and work. The phrase implies both the newness of each of those circumstances, as well as the necessity that they will need to be normalized, integrated into the reality of our daily lives. Once we’ve settled into new routines and emotional patterns, our “normal” won’t be quite so new anymore, will it? The question is a subject of debate.

There is a large middle ground between the event that increases the need for “the new normal” and its final acceptance. Some people think it can’t handle tragedies. But the phrase keeps coming up in conversation, and it has made me realize that“normal”is the last word I would use to describe the fragile place I currently occupy. I find myself there as I mourn the loss of my grandfather, who died in September. For example, the new normal is to have Thanksgiving without Grandfather, then to remember him on what would have been his 75th birthday just a few days later. In other words, during this year of firsts, the new normal is a time of transition, not of arrival.

It strikes me that this is something to be celebrated, not worried over. Part of living positively is meeting ourselves wherever we are. And as I continue to navigate this in-between time, this period of slowly accepting my father’s absence from the Earth, I recognize that each step along the way is a worthwhile part of a healthy grieving process.

The same idea would apply to more positive changes, like a new home or job, as well as the challenges of the end of a relationship or a difficult medical reality. The new normal isn’t something any of us step into all at once. It’s something we become, move toward, and, eventually, accept. Let’s not be in a rush to reach that destination. The journey has much to teach us.

8 . Have you ever considered starting over? Ten years ago I did just that. I'd worked in advertising throughout my ______ life. But it wasn't until my newborn son became very ill that I had the courage to ______ my job and decided to pursue an ambition I'd always held since school: a career in medicine. I'm now a newly qualified doctor working in London.

Our son became ______ ill soon after birth. When he was ______ to St George's Hospital, it became ______ that he would face complex and lifelong challenges. The only constant (不变) was the ______ shown by the team of clinicians looking after our son. Interacting with those professionals refueled a passion in me that had long been ______ . I ______ to become a doctor, not only for my son, but also for myself. Just keep pushing and never have any ______ .

Was I ______ for life in the National Health Service(NHS)? Absolutely not. Never have I worked so hard for so little financial reward and with so little ______ . Like many first-year doctors, I ______ myself flying alone just weeks after graduation, working three weekends every month.

Working in the NHS over the past four years has not only made me ______ how complex delivering world-class care can be, but also given me ______ to make it better. In the advertising department we were constantly trying to ______ our customers' experience. Why shouldn't the same principle ______ the NHS? Alongside my clinical work, I've chosen to ______ how digital technologies can create a more patient-centred system, improving ______ to NHS services and streamlining (使……效率更高) the patient journey.

Now, I'm in my 40s. I couldn't be happier to finally call myself a doctor. ______ the long hours, lack of sleep and endless workload, I feel ______ to be able to help others. It's the best thing I've ever done.

10 . Growing up, I always heard people say work hard pays. I never really understood these words until I reached the age where my parents stopped giving me my monthly allowance and asked me to look for a job.

New Year is a season of good news for merrymakers and entrepreneurial (企业家的) characters. My childhood friend was one of the latter. Mike and I were two sides of the same coin. I was an introvert and a bookworm, while Mike was outgoing and a merrymaker. His added advantage over me was that he came from a family of entrepreneurs. Therefore, while I saw the festive season as another time to enjoy, he saw it as a perfect time to make money. Ironically, I needed this side of him, given my present predicament (困境).

Mike was not of the “work hard pays” school of thought but the “work smart” school. When I told him about my predicament, he saw a business partner. He confided ( 吐 露 ) in me about his business idea — making and selling festive decorations. Having noticed my disbelieving look, he told me he had researched and realized that only one shop sold festive decorations with exorbitant ( 过 高 的 ) price, which meant that there was room for competition. However, I reminded him starting a business, let alone competing with an established enterprise, required capital. He told me, “Not really. All we had to do was make some decorations ourselves.” Upon that, we made some special designs and hit the ground running.

News about our selling decorations spread like wildfire. Mike’s decision to publish brochures advertising our products was a genius marketing trick. Within three days, we had sold about 50 sets of decorations, and as they say, the rest is history.

My parents’ decision to stop my monthly allowance served to teach me the value of work. However, it was my entrepreneurial adventure with Mike that taught me that working smart is better than working hard.