How to Express Love for Moms

2 . The nature of compassion fatigue (同情疲劳) means that many working in traditional care-giving roles are likely to experience its symptoms. This includes first responders, medical professionals, social workers, journalists, and lawyers specializing in family law or criminal law.

Kelli Collins, a licensed family therapist, remarks “Think about muscle fatigue—if you work out too hard, your muscles might simply give out. In the same way, compassion fatigue means your ability to offer compassion to others is dramatically affected.”

Collins herself experienced compassion fatigue as a young therapist working in a community mental health setting, where she “had the strong desire to help” but quickly realized some things were out of her “rang of influence”. She felt herself becoming easily annoyed with loved ones, sleeping very little, and fantasizing about changing careers. It was an overwhelming time, during which she felt she was failing her clients.

“I thought that by giving endless compassion to my clients, I was ‘leaving it all on the field’. In fact, bearing the responsibility for my clients’ pain without consideration for my own needs and limits meant that I wasn’t a particularly effective therapist,” she says.

Lynne Hughes, who founded Comfort Zone in 1999 and now serves as CEO, lost both her parents as a child, experiencing first-hand the lack of resources and support for grieving children. Hughes expresses similar feelings about the challenge of compassion fatigue, stressing the importance of looking inward.

“Suffering from compassion fatigue does not mean you’re bad at helping or caring, it only means the scale between caring for others and caring for yourself is no longer balanced,” she says. “When you’re in a role where you’re nurturing and caring for others — it’s crucial to extend that nurture and care to yourself so that ‘your well’ does not run dry.”

But both Hughes and Collins emphasize that it’s not only traditional caregivers who experience compassion fatigue. “It is applicable to anyone in a caring role,” says Hughes, while Collins believes it is a uniquely human condition, occupational or not.

4 . My husband gave me a surprise gift for Christmas-a gift that, at the time, seemed odd. It was a little, a cute, colourful bird, conure(锥尾鹦鹉). She liked biting at first, but she quickly became the sweetest little creature, and she _________ every day. I was looking forward to every morning to seeing her.

Before I would never have _________ myself owning a bird but now she had _________ her little self firmly around my heart. _________, three days ago, she seemed not quite herself. She was _________ to fly. So, I brought her to the vet(兽医), and she was much more _________ than I could have imagined. It was touch and go, but she _________ it through the night. But when it was starting to look like she was almost out of the woods, we _________ her quite suddenly.

I was overwhelmed. I cried all the way to the vet to _________ her little body. When I walked into the clinic, they brought my little conure out in the travel cage I’d __________ her in. She was placed in a felt pouch(毡袋), with a flower tied to it with a ribbon(丝带). I settled my bill while wiping __________ off my cheeks.

When I turned around to leave, I was __________ to see a girl standing in front of me. She looked at me right in the eyes with a look of sincere __________ and asked me if I wanted a hug. I __________ on her shoulder because that’s exactly what I __________ . It was the kindest gesture that I’d never expected.

I like staying overnight at my Gramma’s house — that is, until Gramma starts telling me how wonderful my cousin Maya is. Then it’s Maya this and Maya that until I don’t ever want to hear another word about her.

That’s why I wasn’t too excited when Gramma called me on the phone to “come on over and bring your pajamas.” When I got there, it was worse than I’d expected. There, in Grandpa’s big leather rocker, sat Maya, all dressed up and formal-looking and wearing fancy shoes as if she’d just been to a party.

“Surprise, Kristen!” Gramma said. “Your cousin Maya and her parents have traveled in from the East Coast on business. Maya gets to stay with us this afternoon.” Gramma chattered away about how excited she’d been for this surprise get-together, and how cousins ought to get to know each other better.

I hung my baseball cap in the closet and set my backpack by the stairway, all the time smiling and nodding as if I’d been waiting forever for this chance to spend an afternoon with Maya. Grandpa’s chair squawked (咯咯叫) as Maya rocked back and forth. It’s the chair I like best in the house, the one I usually sit in. I sat down on the sofa across from her.

Shortly, Gramma went off to the kitchen to “see about some lunch,” she’d said. That left me stuck in the living room with rocking Maya.

She was still small but taller than I’d remembered her from her last visit four years ago. She was good at small talk, though, and was chatting away about how nice it was to see me again. But I could tell that she didn’t really think so. The last time she was here, we’d had hours of fun together building caves out of Gramma’s sofa pillows.

After that, I’d heard about her only through Gramma’s tales. Maya taking piano lessons. Maya learning math. Maya, Maya, Maya. Now Maya was here, looking great with the latest haircut and a fancy dress.

Glancing down at my jeans and my old sneakers, I wished I hadn’t come.

“How do you know all these things about me?” I asked.

6 . People are looking to make meaning after the global pandemic. And one way that some of us do this is to credit coincidences—the unexpected concurrence (同时发生) of events—with helping to find jobs, friends and spouses, make significant career decisions and relieve pains. Scholars disagree on the cause of coincidences. Some say they are random and due to probability. Others see God or spiritual forces at work. Still others say it’s our subconscious making connections. No matter the cause, people who study coincidences say that paying attention to these moments may help us, especially in times of stress.

Studies show that noticing coincidences may help boost both the effectiveness of psychotherapy and mental well-being. Michael Schauch, 42, an investment-portfolio manager in Squamish, British Columbia, who is an avid mountaineer, lost his best friend Brent last year. A few months later, Mr. Schauch climbed a mountain he and Brent often scaled together. At the summit, Mr. Schauch found hundreds of ladybugs. When he climbed a different mountain on the anniversary of Brent’s death, he saw a ladybug as he started up each new section of the rock face. “I knew at once that it was Brent, and that he was still there with me, as if to say: ‘You’ve got this, Mike. Keep going!’” he says.

Coincidences can make the world feel like it makes good sense, says David B. Yaden, an assistant professor at the Johns Hopkins University School. Varieties of spiritual experiences show a correlation (关联) between coincidences and an increase in positive emotions，better personal relationships and a greater sense of meaning in life.

Coincidences are more likely to happen to certain people. “People who are troubled by distress and searching for signs are more likely to experience coincidences,” says Bemard Beitman, a psychiatrist and a coincidence researcher. If you’d like to enhance your ability to notice coincidences, there are several strategies, says Lisa Miller, a clinical psychologist: Be open to them. Write them down. Talk about them with others. “We really need this deep inner wisdom.” she says.

A Conflict with My Parents

There is no doubt that teenagers sometimes have conflicts with their parents, and I am no exception.