【推荐1】I spent all of my 30s saying yes. Saying yes to things I wanted to do, but a lot of the time saying yes to things I didn’t_________. This was a_________technique. I thought it would accelerate (加速) people’s opinion or me: the woman who could do it all.

At the time, I thought I was_________it. I was making new friends and developing new interests. I joined the board of my children’s school and_________my days with around 20 other activities to do.

And then several events_________everything: pandemic restrictions (疫情限制), serious medical problems and losing my job. All these helped me see how_________I was.

All at once, I_________how good it felt not to be_________every second of every day. For the first time, I could carefully choose how I spent my days. Having to say yes turned into the beauty of choosing to say no.

Looking back, the_________to say yes and smile was my choice. I felt obliged (有义务的) to say yes, from driving people to the airport to exchanging a carpool (拼车) day, from attending charity events to seeing family every Friday night. I__________wanted to solve everyone’s problems and offered good__________. I was everyone’s cheerleader, but forgot how to cheer for myself along the way.

But saying no is being my own__________. And it’s not saying no to caring for family and friends, or helping someone out when they’re in need. Instead. it’s a small change in mindset (思维模式), taking a__________before agreeing. I take a breath, and check my energy and ability__________jumping in.

Most importantly, I tell my kids there’s nothing__________with saying no. To give of yourself is important but to save yourself is important, too.

【推荐3】In present times, stress is one of the major causes of mental illness and physical illness. Stress is no _________ to us. Everybody has met and experienced it. It lives in our homes, workplaces, and _________ follows us wherever we go, in some form or other. But do you know why you can’t _________ it?

You get stressed because you _________ to get stressed. This is ridiculous (荒谬的), you might say. You’re right. Who would _________ that stress is a choice that we make? And why in the world would we choose stress? Well, it is because we do not realize that we’re doing that. It happens _________. Choosing stress is easy, but the other way around is a _________ task.

Most of us would take the easy _________, the path of minimum efforts. We’re under stress at times _________ we don’t do anything that we should do — just because either we’re __________ or we don’t have __________ in ourselves. When you don’t complete your task on time, and the __________ draws near, stress envelops you.

If you did your task or carried your __________ as it should be, then you would not be stressed. Choosing not to get stressed is like swimming against the tide. Initially (最初), it __________ effort because you are used to going with the flow of your __________ behavior. So we need to overcome our laziness and self-abasement to be stress-free.

【推荐1】My mother told me seriously, “I am glad that you have brains because you don’t have good looks.” I ________ what my mother said to heart but I was not ________ her. I wanted to prove how ________ I was, so I did really well in school. Just ________ someone tells you that you are not pretty or you are not smart, it doesn’t mean you have to give up, because the only one you have for your ________ is yourself.

Ballet and gymnastics were the most important things in my life. They had so much ________ for me, and I think they also helped to ________ me. In the Auschwitz concentration camp (奥斯威辛集中营), I could not ________ what was outside of me. The soldiers would ________ throw me into a gas chamber (毒气室) at any time. But at night, I could ________ my head and dance in my mind.

When I came to America, I just wanted to be like everyone else. If you asked me who I was, I would say, “Who do you want me to be?” And I never told anyone I was in Auschwitz until I read Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl.

I was so ________ to learn. I had a friend who was a professor at the University of Texas, El Paso. I didn’t have a(n) ________, but he fixed it somehow so that I could be a ________ in the school. For four years, I graduated with ________. Learning and thinking had always been a ________ for me when I was young, so the school ________ that part of me that needed ________ comfort. My ________ is what kept me alive in Auschwitz, and it’s what kept me going after moving to America.

Returning to Auschwitz was ________ the best thing for my healing. I was also able to say goodbye to my past. Every day, I work to honor the pain that I carry from Auschwitz. It lives right here in my heart. I don’t let it control me, though. I acknowledge it and move on. I call it my precious ________.