1 . When I was three, I had a very good friend named Gemma. She was fearless where I was anxious, rebellious where I was conservative, and _________ where I was awkward. She was also entirely imaginary. With Gemma’s support, I almost made it to the top shelf of the bookcase before my parents found me — and “Gemma said it was fine!” did not _________ me from a telling-off (责骂).

I cannot remember when or how I “met” Gemma, and, perhaps sadder still, I do not remember the _________ time I “saw” her. _________ my brain created her, she inspired me to go on adventures I would not have had the confidence to embark upon without her. It _________ me, then, that 72 percent of nursery workers believe children have fewer imaginary friends than they did five years ago, as is shown by a recent survey. This is believed to be a result of _________ screen time.

It is thought that 40 percent of us at one time or another had imaginary friends during our _________. In an essay for Aeon, writer Sophie Elmhirst found that 81 percent of those surveyed had “lost” their imaginary friends after they turned ten, but most of these friendships ended _________. Perhaps imaginary friends simply stay with us for as long as we need them. They move on when our lives become too _________ for our brains to make space to generate their own entertainment.

If you have enjoyed an imaginary friendship, I would guess that you did not __________ sit down to create a perfect pal. They probably arrived as an indication of the thoughts and ideas you never knew you had. In order to be a good __________ to an imaginary friend, you need to be able to make “what if?” into an exciting proposition. When we grow up, we are too quick to finish the sentence with “what if it goes wrong?”

Having grown up, we might not need our imaginary friends anymore, but we could still use a reminder that a little bit of boredom is good for us, and that our brains can create the best ideas when they are left to their own devices. If there are fewer imaginary friends __________ the worlds where our children live, that might lead to a future with fewer artists, writers and problem-solvers. This is a real cause for __________.

As an adult, I think of my fearless, invisible friend Gemma whenever I have to do something that __________ me — usually public speaking, rather than scaling a bookcase. However, whenever I __________ my own expectations and meet myself in a place that I did not think I could quite reach, I can hear my subconscious whispering, “Gemma made me do it.”

2 . Some children are natural-born bosses. They have a strong need to make _________, manage their environment, and lead rather than _________. Stephen Jackson, a Year One student, “operates under the theory of what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine,” says his mother. “The other day I bought two new Star Wars Lightsabers (光剑). Later, I saw Stephen with the two _________ ones while his brother was using the old ones.”

“_________ the extended family, and you’ll probably find a bossy grandparent, aunt, uncle or cousin in every _________. It’s an inheritable trait (遗传的特征),” says Russell Barkley, a professor at the Medical University of South Carolina. Other children who may not be particularly bossy can gradually gain dominance when they _________ their parents are weak, hesitant, or in disagreement with each other.

Whether it’s inborn nature or developed _________ at work, too much control in the hands of the young isn’t _________ for children or the family. Fear is at the root of a lot of bossy behaviour, says family psychologist John Taylor. Children, he says in his book From Defiance to Cooperation, “have secret feelings of weakness” and “a desire to feel safe.” It’s the parents’ role to provide that _________.

When a “bossy child” doesn’t learn limits at home, he is to face lots of troubles __________ the family. The overly willful and unbending (倔强的) child may have trouble __________ teachers and coaches, for example, or trouble keeping friends. It can be pretty __________ as the top dog because no one likes your bossy ways.

“I see more and more parents giving up their __________,” says Barkley, who has studied bossy behaviour for more than 30 years. “They bend too far because they don’t want to be as __________ as their own parents were. But they also feel less __________ about their own parenting skills. Their kids, in turn, feel more anxious.

3 . The scars of love

Some years ago on a hot summer day in south Florida a little boy decided to go for a swim in the old swimming hole behind his house. In a hurry to dive into the ____ water, he ran out of the back door, ____ behind shoes, socks, and shirt as he went.

He flew into the water, not realizing that as he ____ toward the middle of the lake, a crocodile was swimming toward him. His mother in the house was ___ the window and saw the two. In great ____, she ran toward the water, shouting to her son as ___ as she could. Hearing her loud voice, the little boy became ____ and made a U-turn to swim to his mother. It was too late. Just as he reached her, the crocodile reached him. From the ____, the mother grabbed her little boy by the arms just as the crocodile snatched his legs. That began an incredible tug-of-war between the two. The crocodile was much ____ than the mother, but the mother was much too passionate to let go. A farmer happened to drive by, heard their screams, raced from his truck, took aim and ____ the crocodile.

Remarkably, after weeks and weeks in the hospital, the little boy survived. His legs were extremely scarred by the ____ of the animal. And, on his arms, were deep scratches where his mother’s fingernails dug into his flesh in her effort to ____ to the son she loved.

The newspaper reporter, who interviewed the boy, asked if he would show him his scars. The boy lifted his legs. And then, with obvious pride, he said to the reporter, ‘But look at my arms. I have great scars on my arms, too. I have them ____ my Mom wouldn’t let go.’

You and I can identify with that little boy. We have scars, too. No, not from a crocodile, or anything quite so ____. But, the scars of a painful past. Some of those scars are unsightly and have caused us deep regret. But, some wounds, my friend, are because God has refused to ____. In the midst of your struggle, he’s been there holding on to you.

4 . “Just the man I was looking for,” said a voice at Winston’s back.

He turned round. It was his friend Syme, who worked in the Research Department. Syme was a philologist, a specialist in Newspeak. Indeed, he was one of the enormous team of experts now ______ in compiling the Eleventh Edition of the Newspeak dictionary.

“How is the dictionary ______?” asked Winston.

“Slowly,” said Syme. “I’m on the adjectives. It’s fascinating.”

He had ______ immediately at the mention of Newspeak.

“The Eleventh Edition is the definitive edition,” he said. We’re getting the language into its final shape --- the shape it’s going to have when nobody speaks anything else. When we’ve finished with it, people like you will have to learn it all over again. You think, I dare say, that our chief job is inventing new words. But not a bit of it! We’re ______words --- scores of them, hundreds of them, every day. We’re cutting the language down to the ______. The Eleventh Edition won’t ______ a single word that will become obsolete before the year 2050.”

His thin dark face had become animated and his eyes had grown almost dreamy.

“It’s a beautiful thing, the destruction of words. It isn’t only the synonyms, there are also the antonyms. After all, what justification is there for a word which is simply the opposite of some other words? A word contains its ______in itself. Take ‘good’, for instance. If you have a word like good, what need is there for a word like ‘bad’? ‘Ungood’ will do just as well --- better, because it’s an exact opposite, which the other is not. Or again, if you want a stronger version of ‘good’, what sense is there in having a whole string of ______useless words like ‘excellent’ and ‘splendid’ and all the rest of them? ‘Plusgood’ covers the meaning, or ‘doubleplusgood’ if you want something ______ still. Of course we sue those forms already, but in the final version of Newspeak there’ll be nothing else. In the end the whole notion of goodness and badness will be covered by only six words --- in reality, only one word. Don’t you see the beauty of that, Winston?”

A sort of vapid eagerness fitted across Winston’s face. Nevertheless Syme immediately detected a certain ______ of enthusiasm.

“You haven’t a real appreciation of Newspeak, Winston,” he said almost sadly. “In your heart you’d prefer to ______ to Oldspeak with all its vagueness and its useless shades of meaning. You don’t grasp the beauty of the destruction of words. Do you know that Newspeak is the only language in the world whose vocabulary gets smaller every year? Don’t you see that the whole aim of Newspeak is to ______ the range of thought? In the end we shall make thoughtcrime literally impossible, because there will be no words in which to express it. Every concept that can ever be needed will be expressed by exactly one word, with its meaning rigidly ______. Already, in the Eleventh Edition, we’re not ______ that point. But the process will still be continuing ______ you and I are dead. Every year fewer words, and the range of consciousness always a little smaller. Even now, there’s no reason or excuse for committing thoughtcrime. But in the end there won’t be any need even for that. Has it ever occurred to you, Winston, that by the year 2050, at the very latest, not a single human being will be alive who could understand such a conversation as we are having now?”

5 . Because conflict and disagreements are part of all close relationships, couples need to learn strategies for managing conflict in a healthy and constructive way. Some couples just ____ and deny the presence of any conflict in a relationship. ____ , denying the existence of conflict results in couples ____ to solve their problems at early ____, which can then lead to even greater problems later on. Not surprisingly, expressing anger and disagreement leads to lower marital (婚姻的) satisfaction at the beginning. However, this pattern of behavior ____ increases in marital satisfaction over time. Research suggests that working through conflicts is an important predictor of marital satisfaction.

So, what can you do to manage conflict in your own relationships? First, try to understand the other person's point of view and put yourself in his or her place. People who are ____ to what their partner thinks and feels ____ greater relationship satisfaction. For example. researchers found that among people in dating relationships ____ marriages, those who can adopt their partner's perspective show more positive ____, more relationship-enhancing attributes and more constructive responses to conflict.

Second, because conflict and disagreements are an ____ part of close relationships, people need to be able to apologize to their partner for wrongdoing and ____ forgiveness from their parents for their own acts. Apologies minimize conflict, lead to forgiveness. and serve to restore relationship closeness. In line with this ____ , spouses (配偶) who are more forgiving show higher mental quality over time. Increasingly, apologizing can even have ____ health benefits. For example, when people reflect on hurtful ____ and grudges (怨恨), they show negative physiological effects, including increased heart rate and blood pressure, compared to when they ____ on sympathetic perspective-taking and forgiving.