2 . The new radio programme from Self-help expert Glennon Doyle unexpectedly disturbed me. In a session of We Can Do Hard Things, she focuses on boundaries and their importance to our mental happiness. I heartily agree with her, because saying a polite but firm “no” is one of the basics for a happy life. I was, however, interested when she raised the idea that perhaps, as well as learning when to confirm our boundaries, we also need to stretch them. When does a boundary become a cage that locks us away?

Isn’t it always the case that just as you think you’ve got an area of life nailed; somebody comes along to show you that that’s not the case? As I listened, I started to see boundaries that might cause more problems than they were solving.

There was the work boundary that said that unless a project fell exactly into my topics, I wouldn’t take it-which meant that I turned down work that was otherwise interesting and rewarding.

There was the boundary that said I wasn’t to buy anything until I’d reached my savings goal-which resulted in me having to restart my laptop 20 times a day.

And then there was a boundary around relationships that set out exactly how I should be treated and what I wanted in them. Helpful to some extent, it blocked me from allowing someone to express their love for me, even if it wasn’t quite what I had predicted.

Had I been doing boundaries wrong all the time? Did I need to figure them all out again? I’ve spent the past few weeks looking at the boundaries I’ve secretly put in place, and I’ve let myself lower some that have been my protection over the years. Then I’ve come to the conclusion that, when it comes to boundaries, I’m a beginner again, and that’s fine. In fact, being back at the beginning is a blessing because it means there are still lessons to be learned and adventures to be had and that is something for which I can only be grateful.

3 . It was a summer vacation, and I was at a zoo with my family. Because of my extremely pointy nose, when we ________ a group of flamingos (火烈鸟) standing around a pond, my brother shouted at me, “ Hey, look! Your real ________!” Then they asked me to stand in front of my new-found relatives. “Now turn your face to the ________, sweetie,” my mother shot a picture.

When I was 14, the performer Ashlee Simpson got a________ nose job. I looked at her before-and-after pictures, and I was ________ to get one for myself. I told this to my mom but she disapproved. When I________ her to take me to see a plastic surgeon, she would say, “If you believe you’re beautiful, people will see you that way.”

She must have had enough of me, ________ she finally agreed to book me an appointment. Full of ________, I walked into the doctor’s office. He turned my head up and down while a nurse took a photo of my face. The doctor played around with my nose’s appearance with the computer. ________, he showed me his finished work. I had seen that nose on so many other people and I ________ the person looking back at me on that screen. I made excuses to get out of making another appointment and excited the office, never ________ a nose job again.

Looking at the old photo, I'm smiling with________. Had I had that plastic surgery, I would definitely lose my ________ and uniqueness. My mom’s words consistently serve as a ________ that don’t let appearance cast a shadow on our confidence and we should learn to ________ and love who we are.

4 . Our house was across the street from a hospital. We rented the upstairs rooms to outpatients at the clinic. One summer evening as I was preparing supper, there was a knock at the door. I opened it to see a truly awful looking man hardly taller than my eight-year-old daughter.

But the frightening thing was his swollen face. He told me that he’d been hunting for a room since noon but no one seemed to have a room. For a moment I hesitated, but his next words convinced me: “I could sleep on the porch (门廊). My bus leaves early in the morning.”

I went inside and finished getting supper. When we were ready, I asked him to join us. “No, thank you. I have plenty.” And he held up a brown paper bag. When I had finished the dishes, I went out to talk with him for a few minutes.

He told me he fished for a living to support his daughter, who was hopelessly disabled, and her five children. He didn’t tell it by way of complaint; in fact, he was grateful that no pain accompanied his disease. He thanked life for giving him the strength to keep going.

At bedtime, we put a small camp bed in the children’s room for him. When I got up in the morning, the bed linens were neatly folded and the little man was out on the porch. He refused breakfast, but just before he left, he smiled, “Your children made me feel at home. Grownups are bothered by my face, but children don’t seem to mind.” I told him he was welcome to come again.

In the years he came to stay overnight with us there was never a time that he did not bring us fish or vegetables. Other times we received packages. Knowing that he must walk three miles to mail these, and knowing how little money he had made the gifts more precious. I know our family always will be grateful to have known him; from him we learned what it was to accept the bad without complaint and the good with gratitude.

5 . On Nov.18, 1995, Itzhak Perlman, the violinist, came on stage to give a concert.

If you have ever been to a Perlman concert, you know that getting on stage is no ________ achievement for him. He was stricken with polio as a child, and so he walks ________ two crutches. The audience sits quietly while he ________ his way across the stage to his chair and begins his play.

But this time, something went wrong. Just as he finished the first few bars, one of the strings on his violin broke. We thought that he would have to stop the concert. But he didn’t. ________, he waited a moment, closed his eyes and then ________ the conductor to begin again.

The orchestra began and he played with such ________ and such power and such purity as they had never heard before. Of course, anyone knows that it is ________ to play a harmonious work with just three strings. I know that, and you know that, but that night Itzhak Perlman ________ to know that.

When he finished, there was an awesome ________ in the room. And then people rose and cheered. There was an extraordinary outburst of applause from ________ corner of the auditorium. He smiled, wiped the sweat from his brow and then he said in a quiet and ________ tone—You know, sometimes it is the artist’s task to find out how much music you can still make ________ what you have left. This powerful ________ has stayed in my mind ever since I heard it. And who knows?

Perhaps that is the ________ of life — not just for artists but for all of us, our task in this shaky, fast-changing, bewildering world ________ we live is to make music, at first with all that we have, and then, when that is no longer possible, to make music with what we have left.

9 . My best friend traveled to stay with our family last weekend. When she arrived, she went straight to the kitchen and, without asking, ate a spoonful of raspberry jam and some dried fruit. She wasn’t being rude. I knew she would do this. We’ve known each other for almost 20 years. She can eat anything she wants from my kitchen. Indeed, I bought her favorite fruits and snacks at the shop that morning.

Our long weekend together was luxuriously (惬意地) simple. I was recovering from surgery (手术) and couldn’t go to shopping malls. We passed the time running errands (做杂事), going to the post office and collecting dry cleaning. We drank way too many cappuccinos. But we talked about every little detail of our lives.

There’s never been a quiet moment in our friendship. We’ve lived in different cities for almost a decade. Reunions demand constant conversation. our personalities are matched, to be sure, and a shared history is indescribably valuable. We were competitors in high school before bonding over a bad experience. Then we discovered the many interests that we had in common. Our friendship cemented (巩固) itself quickly. We stayed companions through law school, through our first jobs and our first boyfriends. We supported each other through break-ups and breakthroughs. Ours is a friendship for the ages.

There is something special about friends who know everyone and everything about you. They are rare. These are the people you’ve chosen to witness your life. They have seen the bright lights of achievement, the depths of despair (绝望) and the boring routine (平淡乏味) of the in-between.

It’s special to unpack feelings and frustrations without wasting time filling in the blanks. As my long weekend shows, with such friends we don’t have to “do”, we simply have to “be”. We drop the act, the performance, the public version of ourselves.

The special friendships are those which never fail to delight, the continuation of which is worth the extra effort, despite distance and difference sneaking (溜进) into your separate lives. I had the very great joy of this reminder last weekend. I’m lucky to have found this friend, to see a future where her companionship remains. Being together is perfection.

10 . When struggling to reach a goal, don’t let limitations define you. Use them as _________ to push beyond your comfort zone. That way you’ll find creative _________ and better understand your inner strengths. And it’s inner strengths that define how you’ll deal with _________ in life.

At the age of 20, Bryan joined the army. One day, he was behind the wheel when a roadside bomb _________. As result, Bryan lost his left hand and both legs. Several days later, Bryan _________ up at a medical center with his mother by his side. It was in that _________ that his mother said the words that defined the _________ for the rest of his life. She said, “You know you have _________ two choices here, right?” He _________, “Move on, or roll over and die.” She said, “And you’re going to...” To which he replied, “Move on.”

Bryan noticed that the patients who were making __________ were the ones who accepted their __________ and worked hard to move forward. From the start, Bryan __________ himself. He refused to let his injury __________ him from living his life. The process of learning to use his prostheses (假肢) was a __________ and difficult journey, but his mother and friends were there to __________ him.

Today, Bryan lives a __________ life and is a motivational speaker. In his free time, he loves to snowboard, skateboard and enjoy time on his motorcycle. Bryan’s story is powerful __________ that we too can overcome our limitations. We mustn’t let them stop us from moving forward but push ourselves to rise above and __________ varieties of possibilities. We all have our __________, but if you believe you can __________ them, you will.