Happiness is not natural.It is a here human construct. A state of contentment(let alone happiness) is     1     by our genetic design because it would lower our guard against possible threats to our survival.

Chasing happiness is like chasing an elusive ghost, but the positive thinking industry claims to know its secrets.Self-help was popularized by Norman Vincent Peale, a colorful American pastor,       2    by several Republican presidents, including Richard Nixon and Donald Trump. He invented “positive thinking'", a concept now deeply embedded in our culture and steadily growing in influence.The global personal development industry was valued at S38.28 billion in 2019 and is expected to grow at a rate of 5.1%.

Popular films and books are full of     3     inspirational statements about how all you need to do is believe in yourself and then you'll be able to achieve anything in life. This is simply, and obviously, not true. I don't think there is a need to explain that many obstacles and misfortunes in life are inevitable, or unsurmountable. Our ancestors knew this, and many philosophical and religious traditions are based on the     4     that being alive is a very challenging task,which comes with significant amounts of suffering. It goes without saying that we should do all we can to maximize our sense of well-being and minimize our suffering, but the end result cannot be a state of     5     happiness.We are not designed that way.

The self-help genre is not a homegeneous beast, however. It is,in fact, ironie how self-help books on happiness and those on how to make it big in life are lumped together in the same bookshop shelves, given that many of the former tell us that caring too much about the latter is the main     6     to happiness.

The inevitable clash between mandatory     7     and the realities of our existence comes with a heavy psychological price. It could be argued that positive psychology blames those who are suffering for their     8     ,as it is based on the misconception that unhappiness is entirely avoidable.It follows therefore that an unhappy person must be inadequate and incompetent.Positive psychology encourages people who are struggling with a particular goal to persevere in the face of unfavorable odds, which is much more     9     psychologically in the long run than accepting defeat.

I believe that coming to     10    with life as it is,and not the happiness industry tells us it could be, will make us happier, and we will feel more at peace with ourselves and with the world. Unfortunately, the devil always has the best tunes.

Although literally hundreds of traps can open a gateway to team disaster, the following traps are among the most common ones that need to be discussed.

Some managers, in their sincere efforts to be good team leaders, make a serious mistake: they withdraw from their group and     1     avoid interacting with team members. They wrongly assume that the best way they can help the team become more self-directed is by personally becoming less     2    .

A team can become so focused on achieving its own goals that it does not consider the     3     its actions may have on other groups or organizations. Outsiders see the team as arrogant and cruel. Insiders see the team as effective and misunderstood. Overall, the team’s belief in its own     4     has a damaging effect on the performance of the organization as a whole.

In this trap, a team may regularly make decision on which no following action is ever taken. Members are then frustrated by the collective     5     of responsibility. In instances where action is taken and the execution is poor or a mistake is made, no one takes responsibility. It is rarely clear who is responsible for     6     action items, and when an action item is regarded as the responsibility of the entire team, nothing happens.

Failure to see the “big picture” can lead a team to     7     strategies that help improve its own performance but leave the rest of the organization in a mess. Not having the information that allows seeing the forest rather than the trees can lead to suspect plans and poorly reasoned decision.

Teams that have a tendency to repeatedly postpone difficult decisions will find that their options become increasingly     8    . Ironically, by hesitating, the team finally makes a decision—by default rather than by informed choices.

Tricks to increase employee involvement and participation—like suggestion boxes—can actually have the     9     effect. When individuals are rewarded for contributing suggestions through cash, there is little incentive (激励) for team members to work together to     10     problems and implement solutions.

Things I’ve Learned From My First Year Of High School

I just finished my first year of high school, and it has been     1     different from middle school. High school has brought me so many different experiences. Some I am grateful for, yet some have not been beneficial. However, all of them have taught me so many different things, and I would not have been able to     2     my first year of high school without them. The things I have learned have been so helpful to me and can also     3     to things outside of school.

1. You’re expected to demonstrate maturity and responsibility

High school teachers won’t     4     “hold your hand” as much as middle school teachers did. Your teachers may move faster through lessons. When you have questions or meet with     5     challenges, it’s important to speak up. If speaking up makes you nervous at first, you can start by using email to build your     6     level and confidence.

High school teachers enforce higher standards, and most don’t tolerate some of the behaviors that were acceptable in middle school. Again, the goal is to prepare you for college and real life. Even if the     7     seems tough at first, remember that you’re learning helpful and important life skills.

2. Find out who your true friends are

Genuine friends are friends that you can tell everything to and they will not tell anyone else without your permission. They are also there whenever you need them, whether that is to rant or you just need a shoulder to cry on. When you find your true friends, stick with them. The thing about friends is: quality over     8    .

To be honest, high school is not easy at first, but with time, you will get to appreciate and     9     everything around your experiences. The memory will never     10    , because it is the most memorable journey. I have learned so much during my first year of high school, and I am sure that I am going to learn a lot more.

Life is full of challenges, but we must learn to    1    after facing difficulties.     2       we encounter setbacks, it's crucial to stay positive and not get caught up     3    . Sometimes, things may not    4     as planned, but we can still     5     the experiences we gain. By staying strong and determined, we can    6     in our lives and the lives of others. It's important to     7    the pieces when we fall and keep moving forward. Staying     8     loved ones provides support and encouragement when times are tough. However, even the strongest of us can     9     sometimes, and it's okay to ask for help. Remember,     10       is our best guide in navigating through life's ups and downs.

The mission for explorers, BØrge Ousland, a Norwegian, and Mike Horn, a South African-born Swiss, was to navigate their way across the 600 miles to the South Pole    1    —no dogsleds or airdrops of equipment, no food or fuel along the way. When, in 2006, the two men finally reached their destination, Cape Arkticheskiy in Siberia, in the pitch dark of polar winter, they were utterly    2    , had frostbite(冻疮), but were still in one piece. What they had accomplished stands as one of the most daring polar expeditions in recent memory: setting out in total darkness and     3    physically and mentally. That had been the essence of the trip. Reaching the pole was necessary, but almost irrelevant conclusion.

Why would they have put themselves in this position? This was, actually, exactly what they had wanted. Both men had been adventuring since boyhood, taking    4    high calculated risks. At some point, they left their comfort zones and never went back. For them, going to extremes that may seem insane was actually a logical progression. They discovered that they could earn a living—writing books, taking pictures, making films, and presenting    5    speeches. Now, they have sponsors: outdoor gear manufacturers, construction outfits, an adventure travel agency, a watch company. Extreme adventure is their    6    .

Some people say that the two men have a death wish, but this just seems to    7    Mike and BØrge. They will tell you that it isn’t a desire to be closer to death that attracts them; it’s a desire to be closer to life. They’ve been to the mountaintop. They know that willpower can be built, and that ordinary people, like themselves, have abilities    8    their wildest dreams. They’re just the ones who are out there, searching the wilderness on behalf of the rest of us. They aren’t marking dots on a    9    map anymore. That was accomplished long ago. What they are doing now is exploring the inner map, the mental and emotional map. What will they learn about themselves from being in a position where nothing    10    except staying alive? What, exactly, is the human being capable of? This is what drives them.

A group of boys stood around a tree. “What a tall tree!” they said to each other, “It would be exciting to climb to the top.”

The group of boys made a     1     to play a game to see who could climb to the top of the tree fastest. Their mothers were     2     not far away, looking at their kids as they played.

One of the     3     was David. He was the     4     boy in the group. Nobody thought he would win the     5    .

Then the game started. All of the boys tried to climb as high as they could. Although the others climbed faster than David at     6    , he reached the top of the tree fastest in the end.

His mother was     7     to see this. She asked, “David, how did you reach the top of the tree so     8    ?”

“It was easy.” David said. “The other kids kept looking down as they climbed. When they realized how high they were, they got     9     and were afraid of looking down. However, I looked only up. When I saw how close I was, I kept going higher and higher until I reached the top.

It is true in life that if we just keep going forward without     10    , we are more likely to reach our goals.

What My Wife and I Talk about When We Talk about Love

My wife used to believe that romantic love is the most important and exciting thing in the entire world when she was a teenager. And the mark of true love is when two good-looking boys get in a physical fight over her. It’s even     1     that they both get injured but don’t end up going to hospital, not because she is worried about them but because it may cause her a lot of     2     and indirect responsibility. One day this will certainly happen to her, if she’s lucky. So you might understand her anger and frustration when I told her that if the other male competitor I have to “fight” with weighs more than 100 kilograms, I will simply hand her over to him without     3    , wish them a happy marriage and walk away with the feeling that tomorrow is another day.

Fortunately, we’ve both grown a lot older and grown out of expecting our life partner to “die” for us     4    . The older we get, the more honest, open and vulnerable we allow each other to be. One of the hardest things about getting older and being in love is knowing when something is just reality and when it’s too much hard work. Identifying what the calm, joyful but often challenging sensation of long-term love is and identifying what has just become totally intolerable is where we all have to really     5     our instincts.

Shared interests are one of the most overrated     6     factors when it comes to choosing a partner. Deciding that someone is a good person, or your soulmate, or made of exactly the same stuff as you just because you both love the music of Faye Wong is ridiculous. Having the same Agatha Christie collection or enjoying most of the movies directed by Richard Linklater will not help you     7     the various unexpected storms of life together.

A much more crucial factor in terms of finding a partner is how much you love their     8    . Since my son was born, I have experienced firsthand how overwhelming it is to be a working parent of a newborn. It has become even more apparent to me that the most important thing in a relationship is how well married couples work as a team. Couples need to be really, really good friends.

When you’re looking for love, and it seems like you might not ever find it, remember you probably have     9     to plenty of love already, just not the romantic kind. This kind of love might not kiss you in the rain or propose marriage. But it will listen to you, inspire and     10     you. It will hold you when you cry and celebrate when you smile. You can carry it with you and keep it as close to you as you can.