1 . Increased involvement from grandparents can be crucial in a child’s development. From helping children navigate stressful situations to giving kids that little extra bit of love and care, grandparents play an important role in the well-being of a child. Now, there’s scientific data to back this up.
According to a study of over 1,500 children, conducted by Professor Ann Buchanan from the Department of Social Policy and Intervention at the University of Oxford in the United Kingdom, children who have tight-knit relationships with their grandparents tend to have fewer problems, both emotionally and when it comes to their behavior. Besides, children also have less difficulty when interacting and maintaining relationships with others.
Kimberly Agresta, the co-founder of Englewood’s Agresta Psychotherapy Group, has also noticed in a study the significant benefits of allowing grandparents to be more involved in children’s lives. “If parents regularly involve grandparents in their child’s life early on, a child can develop real emotional closeness to their grandparents and begin to see them as a source of strong social support,” she stated in an interview. “So a child will feel they have other adults, aside from their parents, who care about them in the same way, and this adds to their sense of stability and security.”
She continued, “Stressful situations are less impactful to such children because they have other people in their lives who they have these attachments to and support from.” This is because grandparents are generally not responsible for disciplining or raising the child, and they’re able to love the child a little more freely and unconditionally than a parent, Agresta explained.
“Grandparents are a wealth of knowledge and information, and not only can they pass on valuable skills from real-life experience, but they can also share the past with their grandchildren,” added Agresta. “They can serve as historians, sharing various traditions and stories about when their own children were growing up, which create s a sense of continuity for a child.” So it looks like it may be time to set up a play date for your kids with their grandparents!
1. What is the impact of children spending time with grandparents according to Buchanan’s study?| A．Improved social skills. | B．Lower intelligence level. |
| C．Better academic performance. | D．Increased behavioral problems. |
| A．More critical. | B．More positive. |
| C．Less supportive. | D．Less judgmental. |
| A．The features of grandparents’ love. |
| B．Various roles grandparents take on. |
| C．The typical qualities of grandparents. |
| D．Grandparents’ advantages over parents. |
| A．By quoting a few people’ opinions. |
| B．By analyzing two scientific surveys. |
| C．By giving the findings of two studies. |
| D．By making comparisons between studies. |
2 . Search “toxic parents”, and you’ll find more than 38, 000 posts, largely urging young adults to cut ties with their families. The idea is to safeguard one’s mental health from offensive parents. However, as a psychoanalyst (精神分析学家), I’ve seen that trend in recent years become a way to manage conflicts in the family, and I have seen the severe impacts estrangement (疏远) has on both sides of the divide. This is a self-help trend that creates much harm.
“Canceling” your parent can be seen as an extension of a cultural trend aimed at correcting imbalances in power and systemic inequality. Today’s social justice values respond to this reality, calling on us to criticize oppressive and harmful figures and to gain power for those who have been powerless. But when adult children use the most effective tool they have—themselves—to gain a sense of security and ban their parents from their lives, the roles are simply switched, and the pain only deepens.
Often, what I see in my practice are cases of family conflict mismanaged, power dynamics turned upside down rather than negotiated. I see the terrible effect of that trend: situations with no winners, only isolated humans who long to be known and feel safe in the presence of the other.
The catch is that after estrangement, adult children are not suddenly less dependent. In fact, they feel abandoned and betrayed, because in the unconscious, it doesn’t matter who is doing the leaving; the feeling that remains is “being left”. They carry the ghosts of their childhood, tackling the emotional reality that those who raised us can never truly be left behind, no matter how hard we try.
What I have found is that most of these families need repair, not permanent break-up. How can one learn how to negotiate needs, to create boundaries and to trust? How can we love others, and ourselves, if not through accepting the limitations that come with being human? Good relationships are not the result of a perfect level of harmony but rather of successful adjustments.
To pursue dialogue instead of estrangement will be hard and painful work. It can’t be a single project of “self-help”, because at the end of the day, real intimacy (亲密关系) is achieved by working through the injuries of the past together. In most cases of family conflict, repair is possible and preferable to estrangement—and it’s worth the work.
1. Why do young people cut ties with the family?| A．To gain an independent life. | B．To follow a tendency towards social justice. |
| C．To restore harmony in the family. | D．To protect their psychological well-being. |
| A．Response. | B．Problem. | C．Bond. | D．Division. |
| A．Break down boundaries. | B．Accept imperfection of family members. |
| C．Live up to their parents’ expectations. | D．Repair a family item that has broken up. |
| A．To advocate a self-help trend. | B．To justify a common social value. |
| C．To argue against a current practice. | D．To discuss a means of communication. |
| A．Colleagues. | B．Husband and wife. | C．Waiter and customer. |
4 . Being a good parent requires providing a child with the gifts of love, attention, energy, and resources unstintingly over a long period of time. It involves developing a small body, but it also involves growing a child’s soul.
Parents are an enormously powerful force in the lives of children. Whether Johnny can read, whether Johnny knows right from wrong, whether Johnny is a happy, well-adjusted kid, or sad and self-destructive, has a whole lot to do with the kind of parenting Johnny has received. If Johnny’s mom and dad have been able to come through with lasting, loving attention, the chances are that Johnny is on track to become a productive, compassionate (富有同情心的) person. If they have not, Johnny is in trouble.
Thirty years ago Chicago professor James S. Coleman showed that parental involvement mattered far more in determining school success than any quality of the formal education system. Across a wide range of subject areas, in literature, science and reading, Coleman estimated that the parent was twice as powerful as the school in determining achievement at age fourteen. Psychologist Lawrence Steinberg, who recently completed a six-year study of 20,000 teenagers in nine different communities, confirms the importance of parents. Steinberg shows that one out of three parents is “seriously disengaged” from his or her adolescent’s education, and this is the primary reason why so many American students perform below their potential and below students in other rich countries.
A weight of evidence now demonstrates obvious links between absentee parents and a wide range of behavioral and emotional problems in children. A 1997 study of 90,000 teenagers — the Add Health Project undertaken (承担) by the Carolina Population Center and the Teenage Health Program at the University of Minnesota found that youngsters are less likely to get depressed, use drugs or become involved in crime when they spent significant time with their parents. This study found that the mere physical presence of a parent in the home after school, at dinner and at bedtime significantly reduces the incidence of risky behavior among teenagers.
1. What does the underlined word “unstintingly” in Paragraph 1 mean?| A．Absolutely. | B．Obviously. | C．Carefully. | D．Generously. |
| A．Children should be taught to be successful in life. |
| B．Parents’ character has a deep influence on children. |
| C．Children are affected by many factors during the growth. |
| D．Parents should be strict with their children about behaviors. |
| A．To know the importance of parents’ company. |
| B．To find out why there are so many serious crimes. |
| C．To get ways to prevent teenagers’ bad behaviors. |
| D．To find links between parents’ education and crimes. |
| A．Ambiguous. | B．Doubtful. | C．Favorable. | D．Unclear. |
1. Who got a new phone?
| A．Daniel. | B．The man. | C．The man’s father. |
| A．He wanted to have a phone like the speaker. |
| B．He didn’t want the speaker to leave for college. |
| C．He was sad that the speaker spent less time with him. |
| A．Think about what he’s missing. |
| B．Turn his phone off for a day. |
| C．Stop playing games on the phone. |
1、父母与子女关系良好的重要性；
2、你希望与你的父母之间的关系是怎样的；
3、如何才能建立这种关系?
注 意：1、100字左右。2、开头已为你写好，不计入总字数。
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1. 表示安慰，2. 提出建议，3. 表示祝愿
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1. 现代社会中父母与孩子的关系有哪些问题；
2. 针对上述问题，你有哪些具体做法。
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9 . Out of all the relationships we have in our lifetime, the one with our parents is the most important. When you think about it, no other relationship is like the one we have with our mom and dad: when we’re young, our parents care for us; when our parents are old, we care for them. But in the middle of this long bond, there usually comes a time when it seems like our parents are our biggest enemies: when we’re teenagers.
As kids, we love nothing more than spending as much time as we can with our parents.
As US psychologist Lisa Damour wrote recently, “Many parents of teenagers long for the days when their preteen laughed at their jokes and happily came along on errands.” So, why is it that as we begin to enter adulthood, we feel so different about the two people who brought us into the world? “Teenagers are going through a very stressful time in their lives: they want to please us, but they also want to break away,” US psychologist Michele Borba said. Borba’s second point is perhaps the biggest reason why our attitude toward our parents changes as we grow older.
We’re no longer kids, and as young adults, we try to be as independent as possible. We soon start to put our friends before our parents. Before we know it, things at home are completely different. But rather than pushing our parents away, we should pay attention to their advice instead of ignoring it.
“
Although sometimes it may seem impossible to follow everything our parents tell us, there’s one thing we should remember - respect is something that works two ways:
It means that instead of not following our parents’ wishes, we should show how mature we are by trusting their wisdom. Indeed, as the girl pointed out, “
| A．Friendship is the most important thing to me. |
| B．Family is the most important thing to me. |
| C．But as we approach our teenage years, it seems like everything our parents do is just annoying. |
| D．In our mid-to-late teenage years, this is when we start to discover who we really are. |
| E．Friends are great, but they’ll come and go. |
| F．If we show respect to others, it will be shown back to us. |
| G．With time passing by, we want to stay with our friends for long. |
It’s hard to talk to dads sometimes. The roles we often expect our fathers to play—protector, provider—can make them seem impenetrable (不可理解的). That’s how it was with my dad. He came to Canada at the age of ten and settled in an immigrant community. He was never much of a talker. He rarely drank, so we didn’t get to see him loosen up after a few beers. He didn’t tell stories about himself at the dinner table or when we went for walks in the park. He was a private person and seemed to want to stay that way.
Bringing up the many questions I had about life before I was born--his early hopes and dreams, loves and heartbreaks—let alone sharing my own feelings, felt like too much for us to handle. I didn’t want to threaten the integrity (完整) of his hard shell. I had gotten used to it, and it made me feel secure.
But when my relationship and career suffered a hit a year ago at the same time, things had to change. I was facing serious questions about my own nature (本性), and I wanted to know that he had faced them, too. I needed to know how he had found his way, because I felt like I had lost mine.
In a severe moment of desperation, it occurred to me that sending an email might be the key. An email can be crafted (心制作) slowly and carefully. I could speak at a comfortable distance and give him room to adjust. He’d be up in his office — a comfortable place filled with bookshelves, dusty CD-ROMs and piles of old newspapers. I’d be at my desk in an apartment 20 minutes away.
So I wrote to him. I told him about my regrets and fears, and I asked him to answer, if he felt like it, and to share something about himself, something that would give me much-needed perspective on my life, especially on relationship and career.
注意: 1. 所编写短文的词数应为150左右;2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。
Two weeks later, his response showed up in my email box.
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I closed the email and started to cry.
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