9 . No matter how friendly your tone is or how honey sweet you are in a conversation, when you use one of these two words (or both) in your sentences, the message to your conversation companion is “You are wrong”.     1     They are “no” and “but”.

These words don’t say, “Let’s discuss this” or “I’d love to hear what you think about this” to people. They say, “You are wrong and I am right.” If your conversation companion is also eager to win at any cost, you will have a potential battle on your hands. The result?     2    

Are you interested in a little test to see how competitive your co-workers are? Try this. For one week, keep a scorecard of how many times each person uses “no” or “but”.     3     And, if you explore a little deeper, you’ll see patterns emerge. For instance, some people use these words to gain power. You’ll see how much people hate it, consciously or not, and how it stifles (抑制) rather than opens up discussions.

    4     Practically without even thinking, I keep count of their use of these two little words. It’s such an important indicator! If the numbers pile up in an initial meeting with a client, I’ll interrupt him or her and say, “We’ve been talking for almost an hour now, and do you realize that you have responded 17 times with either ‘no’ or ‘but’?” This is the moment when a serious talk about changing behavior begins.

If this is your interpersonal challenge, you can do this little test for yourself just as easily as you can to judge your co-workers. Stop trying to defend your position and start monitoring how many times you begin remarks with “no” or “but”.     5     For example That’s true, but...”. Another expression is “Yes, but...”.

10 . Want to explore new cultures, meet new people and engage in meaningful pursuits? You can do all the three with Global Development Association (GDA). No matter what life stage you’re at, wherever you go, and whatever project you undertake with us, you’ll create positive changes in a poor and remote community.

We welcome volunteers from all walks of life and backgrounds. While the majority of our volunteers are between the ages of 17 and 24, we’re currently in need of volunteer managers aged 25 to 75, who play a very important role in the safe and effective operation of our programs. Our positions include project managers, mountain leaders, and communication officers.

Your chosen role could vary from enhancing a community’s access to clean drinking water to preserving valuable local cultures. Or perhaps you might design adventure challenges to train our young volunteers.

Not only will you be aiding the personal growth of our young volunteers, but you’ll also be picking up new skills and expanding your cultural insights. You’ll likely meet individuals who could become lifelong friends.

This summer we have both 4-week and 7-week programmes:

GDA ensures that volunteers work with community members and local project partners where our help is needed. All our projects aim to promote the development of poor and remote communities.

There is no other chance like a GDA programme. Join us as a volunteer manager to develop your own skills while bringing benefits to the communities.

Find out more about joining a GDA programme:

Website: www.glodeve.org

Email: humanresources@glodeve.org