1 . As a boy, I knew little about baseball. Yet I later became the father of two boys, Will and Tim, who were both interested in baseball. On Saturday mornings, I’d take Will out to the playground and play catch with him. Because of my weak arm, the ball often dropped before he could catch it. After many misses, he said one day, “How am I ever going to make the major leagues (联盟)?” “You have the wrong dad, kid,” I thought. Baseball isn’t my thing.

Still, I wanted to give my kids confidence on the field. There was an official Little League in our area, but it was super-competitive and only catered to older boys. I really hoped we had something less competitive, something that welcomed younger boys and girls.

I shared the idea with some neighbors. “That would be great!” they said. Now who could organize such a thing? Not me. I tried to put the idea aside, but it wouldn’t leave me. I finally decided that I must do something about it. So I called the city government, explaining that some families wanted to start a baseball league in our neighborhood. Were there any fields for that? When I had to speak to the official in charge, I got butterflies in my stomach. What if he said no? “Yes, we have two fields for four hours every Sunday morning,” the man said hearing my request. Our league was founded. What a joy it was to sit on the benches, watching Will and Tim playing baseball! And I became the most unlikely baseball commissioner (专员) ever.

Many years have passed. Now Will and Tim are new dads, and I can’t want to see what they’ll have to do. I know better than anyone: Parenthood calls you to do the most unlikely things.

2 . My mother and I don’t speak the same language. Her English is not good, and my Mandarin stopped at the picture-book level on the day I started kindergarten in California, as I realized that the few English words I knew weren’t going to get me very far. I immersed (沉浸) myself in strange grammar and new vocabulary. As my mother tongue withered (逐渐淡去) in my mind, English allowed me to explain my personhood here and silence the narrative that I was just a shy, odd Asian.

My wish to write, however, made me unintelligible to my mother. She couldn’t understand why I’d spoil other better chances. I’d tried to communicate with her in Chinese, searching my mind for sentences: How could I describe my gratitude for a path to self-fulfillment when all I could say was “kai xin” or “happy”? Without the words to bridge the gap between our worldviews, our dissatisfaction and worry turned into stubbornness.

I landed a day job editing a design magazine but worked on my novel in my off-hours. As its main characters, Marissa and Kathleen’s mother-daughter relationship was similar to my own, troubled and split by cultural differences—though always revived by love. But the book is in English, so my mom won’t be able to read it.

Writing the book gave me a reason to mine for details about my family. I’d spent so much of my adolescence shedding (摆脱) my background that when I reached adulthood, I became interested in our history. I started asking questions, hoping to find a new understanding of us.

Her answers were mixed with joyful memories, like the pleasant smell of the flowers my mother would pin to her blouse, or the hubbub(喧闹)of visiting her cousins in the countryside. As her world became clearer to me, I came closer to knowing who she is.

When I showed my mother a copy, she noticed her Chinese name in the acknowledgments and said in Mandarin with a shaking voice, “Now I know you truly love me.” I wish it hadn’t taken this long to find a way to tell her. She may not understand it word for word, but I know she gets the message.

3 . Calling someone your partner sounds wonderful, but it becomes even more enjoyable when that person is also your best friend. Here are five things that happen when your partner is your best friend.

Make each other laugh.     1     Because you understand each other’s sense of humor, you enjoy bringing it out. Laughter lights up the worst of days. Best friends don’t laugh at each other, but they laugh with one another.

Cheer for each other. We all need our own personal cheer leader. Having someone who believes the best in us helps us to know the best in ourselves. Real friends realize our advantages even when we don’t.     2    

Bring out the best in each other. Some people show best parts of themselves while others can bring out the best in you.     3     Something about their presence makes you want to be better people.

    4     We all have parts living inside us somewhere. Many of us hide this part of ourselves. When you bravely reveal these pieces of yourself, you show how much you want to develop a closer friendship. If you find out that your partner accepts your hidden side, you will trust them more. This real friendship draws you closer to one another.

Lend a helping hand. Good friends come together to lend a helping hand. They see the need and help to meet the need.     5     Or occasionally they help you get more fun while you rest.

7 . I was born in 1990 — the year of the white horse. A girl born under this zodiac (生肖) is believed to have a wild, steed-like (骏马般的) spirit that will block her fortunes, bringing her family trouble. These beliefs were planted in my mind as a girl growing up in South Korea. I was repeatedly told to fight against my steed-like spirit and instead try being still, gentle, and quiet.

Actually, when I was young, I loved exploring the mountainous trails behind our house, examining the various soil layers in nearby fields, and generally running wild outdoors. I often returned home with soiled clothes.

In high school, I settled on a quiet career choice: I would become a lawyer. However, when I was accepted into a pre-law program, I found the courses boring. That’s when a teacher said, “You could always get a science degree, and go back into law.”

I took her advice and landed in the United States to study geology (地质学). Shortly thereafter, though, culture shock set in. I was not ready for the intense physical requirements of my field courses. One 6-week summer course required strenuous (费劲的) hikes, camping in extreme heat, and heavy lifting. My cultural upbringing had discouraged such “wild” activities and I had never gone on extended hikes or camps before. But other women in my program were an inspiration. I saw beauty in their strength, and I wanted to be like them.

By the end of my undergraduate degree, I had fully accepted my love of being a tough girl. And I’d given up on the idea of becoming a lawyer. My parents didn’t quite know what to make of my adventurous field life. But they were supportive when I told them about the change in my career direction.

I’m now a postdoc with years of experience collecting samples in challenging field environments, and I’m thankful I resisted the cultural expectations placed on me. My wild, steed-like spirit wasn’t something to suppress (压制). Instead, it led me to a career that’s a perfect fit for me.

8 . I woke to the sound of birds outside my window and lay in bed, going over the busy day ahead of me. Finally, I got up and attempted to switch on the light — nothing happened. I checked my phone. No Wi-Fi, no data. With our unstable cell service, there was no way of knowing if we had received alerts fbr a power failure. I grabbed a sweater, went downstairs, found a flashlight and a match to light the gas stove, and then boiled water to brew coffee. Outside the window, the falling snow obscured (遮蔽) the sunrise. Deep piles of snow covered the road.

My work meetings and deadlines, my sons’ classes and tests, my husband’s plans — everything would have to wait. Why does this happen today of all days?“ I asked. Thankfully, the wood stove was still going strong. I took a deep breath. I supposed we had everything we needed.

The house was quiet as I sipped my coffee and cuddled (搂抱) our dog. One by one, my husband and sons came downstairs and complained about the turn the day had taken.

I opened the curtains to let light in. We gathered around the table and had cereal. After breakfast, my husband played a game of solitaire. Then my sons joined him in building a house of cards that reached three levels until our cat jumped up to investigate and knocked it down. We played a round of Scrabble and had my favorite snow day lunch: grilled cheese and tomato soup.

Then we took a long walk in the woods behind our house, walking along the stream. We spotted deer tracks and played in the snow that was coming down in big fluffy flakes. When we returned, all the clocks in the house were blinking. I started to make dinner, happy to have things back to normal — even better than normal.

It was a day that began without electricity, cut off from the rest of the world, and ended with hot chocolate and power restored. We were recharged by the unexpected gift of a day together.

9 . I worked in a small company with about thirty-five employees (雇员). We had a good-sized kitchen with a fridge that several employees used. But people would often go to the fridge to surprisingly find either their whole lunch missing, or in my case, my can of Cherry Coke gone. I usually kept it in my lunch bag. At times when I bought takeaway food, I would get two—one for lunch and one for dinner—so I didn’t have my lunch bag. Even so, I often couldn’t find the food. It was a shock to everyone.

We doubted who was stealing, but could never prove (证明) it. One day, a good idea came to my mind, and I couldn’t wait to try it.

It was break time at noon. I headed down to the kitchen about five minutes early and gave my Coke such a hard shake that I feared it may actually go off in my hands. I placed it back in the fridge. Then, I hid into a cupboard in the kitchen, waiting for the right moment.

BINGO! A lady came in and took the Coke. I put my hand over my mouth for her to open it, but she took it with her and left. I thought she would open it in the hall. No!

As I left the kitchen, I heard her yell (叫喊). I passed her office, and Coke was everywhere: the walls, the floor, all over her desk, computer, her work, and all over her—everywhere!

Well, food has never gone missing again since then because the lady got fired.