【推荐2】As I walked to a convenience store to get a snack last month, there was another customer ahead of me. And he opened the door for himself without bothering to look back. How rude, I thought. Didn’t he see me? Did he do that on purpose?     1    . I knew it’s a waste of emotional energy on a trivial (微不足道的) moment. But I wondered — why was I taking this incident so personally?

To help answer the question, I turned to Ethan Kross, psychologist and author of Chatter: The Voice in Our Head. He shares ways to slow down when things feel personal.

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If you find yourself in a situation that offends (冒犯) you, pause before reacting, says Kross. Acknowledge your feelings and think about how your response might affect the other person.     3    . This will help us find good solutions to the problem.

Look at the problem from another perspective (视角)

If you still can’t let the personal comment go, you can try distancing yourself from it mentally.     4    .

It might seem like an unusual approach, but Kross’ research has shown that it can help people get out of their heads and promote wise reasoning. In a 2014 study, he found that people displayed more wisdom when trying to figure out their own problem if they thought about it in the third person.

Build up your confidence

Self-confidence can go a long way in protecting us from taking things too personally. If we’re grounded in the fact that we’re unconditionally worthy, Kross says, then we’re less likely to take offense when somebody doesn’t treat us that way.

Kross suggests spending time around people who remind us of care and respect we deserve, like close friends and family members.     5    .

【推荐3】Starting a new job is exciting for lots of reasons. You meet new people, learn new skills, and become part of a team. But there are several things you need to get under your belt before you can really show your new workmates and bosses what you’re made of.

    1    . You just talk with your boss, and understand your responsibilities. Get specific in terms of these expectations. If you’re in sales and part of your job relies on meeting quotas (指定额度) find out what the specific quotas are.     2    , whether your quotas are bringing in a specific amount of profit or a specific number of new clients.

Listen and Learn. Listen actively and learn quietly during team meetings, one-on-ones with your manager, or even casual conversations by the coffee machine. This is not just about understanding your role, it’s about absorbing the company culture, team dynamics, and business objectives. Too many to remember?     3    .

Get to know your boss. His or her leadership and communication style can offer invaluable insights for your long-term success. For example, does your boss prefer weekly email updates or quick daily stand-ups? Do they like to be consulted on every decision, or do they give you more leeway (余地)?     4     because they can make your actions and reporting style more in line with your boss’s expectations.

Accept constructive feedback. Always ask for feedback and take it wisely. Constructive criticism can be challenging to hear, but it offers valuable lessons for improvement.     5    . Then, develop a plan of action to address the points raised and discuss this with the person who offered the feedback.

【推荐1】George Santayana, a philosopher, said those who don’t learn from history are doomed to (注定) repeat it. In other words, if you fail to learn from past mistakes, you’re likely to make them yourself.     1     In addition to providing the knowledge of the past, studying history helps develop transferable (可转移的) skills that will prepare you for various career opportunities down the road. So why not explore useful strategies that will improve the effectiveness of your study?

    2     While reading your textbook, always try and place events, dates, locations, and details within the context of the big picture. How do they fit in? Why are they important to what’s going on? How do they support the sequence of events occurring? There isn’t anything you can’t memorize if you employ this technique.

Watch movies! While educational, most historical films and documentaries are also very entertaining.     3     Thus, if you are serious about learning history, ensure the movie you select is true to historical facts.

Keep important information. To memorize key dates, names and events, you can employ a flashcard, on one side of which writes a key event, date or fact. On the opposite side, write the definition, description or explanation.     4     But it’s just as effective today as it was one hundred years ago.

Take notes in class. Write down only those truly significant things. To achieve this, listen carefully in class and determine which are the most important points made during a lecture.     5     More importantly, organize your notes by topic, then years, decades and centuries, use arrows and other notation (符号) devices to identify important information.