My father often took me to his hospital when I was off my school. He showed me how his medical instruments was used. I felt so closely to him. However, after I went to high school, somehow I become distant from him. I was unwilling talk with him and often disobeyed his rule of not stay out with my friends too late. The disagreement was too sharp that neither he nor I knew what to settle it. One day, he talked with me or hoped to mend our relations. With the efforts made by all sides, we began to understand each other better.

3 . You might have ever noticed how some people can effortlessly talk to anyone they meet, no matter how different their backgrounds are. Or you may have seen that one person always offends someone, no matter what the topic of conversation is. These two situations describe how we can differ in our abilities to interact, get along with, and relate to others around us. In the same way that we vary in traditional academic competencies, we can vary in how socially competent we are. After years of academic research and development, this social ability is now commonly referred to as “social intelligence.”

Social intelligence is the ability to understand other people, how they work, what motivates them, and how to work cooperatively with them. It is a relationship­based construct that centers on the way we understand others, interact with others, and present ourselves to others. As an example, you would not speak in the same way toward your 70-­year-­old mother as you would to your 16-­year­old daughter. In our working lives, we come across different social groups including those from different countries, varying age groups and cultural identities. Being able to acknowledge and understand people’s different backgrounds is a key way to connect with them.

Our ability to navigate successfully through our lives relies heavily on our levels of social intelligence. It can affect the relationships we form with our partners and children, the friendship circles that we build, and our ability to progress in our careers and ambitions. Given the importance of social intelligence in multiple aspects of life, it is therefore in our best interest to better understand the concept of social intelligence and take the following ways to improve it.

[1] Usually when your teacher asks a question there is only one correct answer. But there is one question that has millions of correct answers. That question is “What’s your name?” Everyone gives a different answer but everyone is correct. Have you ever wondered about people’s names? Where do they come from? What do they mean?

[2] People’s first names or given names are chosen by their parents. Sometimes the name of a grandparent or other member of the family is used. Some parents ________. A boy could be named George Washington Smith; a girl could be named Helen Keller Jones.

[3] Some people give their children names that mean good things. Clara means “bright”; Beatrice means “one who gives happiness”; Donald means “world ruler”; Leonard means “as brave as a lion”.

[4] The earliest last names or surnames were taken from place names. A family with the name Brook or Brooks probably lived near a brook(小溪);someone who was called Longstreet probably lived on a long paved road. The Greenwood family lived in or near a leafy forest.

[5] Other early surnames came from people’s occupations. The most common occupational name is Smith which means a person who makes things with iron or other metals. In the past smiths were very important workers in every town and village. Some other occupational names are: Carter — a person who owned or drove a cart; Potter —a person who made pots and pans.

[6] The ancestors of the Baker family probably baked bread for their neighbors in their native village. The Carpenter’s great-great-great-grandfather probably built houses and furniture.

[7] Sometimes people were known for the color of their hair or skin or their size or their special abilities. When there were two men who were named John in the same village the John with the gray hair probably became John Gray. Or the John who was very tall could call himself John Tallman. John Fish was probably an excellent swimmer and John Lightfoot was probably a fast runner or a good dancer.

[8] Some family names were made by adding something to the father’s name. English-speaking people added –s or –son. The Johnsons are descendants of John; the Roberts family’s ancestor was Robert. Irish and Scottish people added Mac or Mc or O. Perhaps all of the MacDonnells and the McDonnells and the O’Donnells are descendants of the same Donnell.

6 . Love your parents

Even if you think that your parents are mean-spirited at times, loving your parents is a normal and fulfilling （满意的）part of life. You love them for the fact that they created you, raised you, and are in part a source of who you are. Here are some ways to love your parents.

    1     A gentle "good morning" and "I love you" will warm a coldest heart. Remember that they brought you into this world. Without your parents, you might sill wander at an unknown corner in an unknown world.

Respect them more and cherish（珍惜）these moments. You can use these moments to learn from them when you're off on your own. It's OK to get angry but angry actions don't help you or your parents. Act calmly, cool off, journal about your feelings, or talk to a friend.     2    

Obey their requests. It will make your attitude better and earn you more respect from them. It may seem like you are going through hell when you don't get what you want or you have to clean. However, you had better remember they keep a roof over your head when it's cold, raining, snowing, or too hot. Understand that parents are human beings and make mistakes.     3     Since you can forgive your friends, why not forgive your parents?

Keep company with them. Do things with your parents like watching TV, or go somewhere with them.       4     Listen to their old stories and learn from them. You will find they are your teachers in this way or another.

Some people simply may not be able to love their parents. .    5     Look for help if you are being abused violently. Parents do not have a right to harm you.

7 . Researchers from the University of Western Australia recently studied 3,000 middle and high school students. Among them were 618 teenagers with one parent who lived away from home for long periods of time because of work. The researchers wanted to know how the work of these “fly-in, fl1y-out” parents might influence the health of their children.

A higher percentage (比例) of teenagers who experienced the long work absence of a parent had emotional (情感的) or behavioral problems compared with those whose parents worked more traditional hours. This supports earlier research finding high percentages of emotional problems in teenagers who often returned to an empty house after school or whose parents were seldom at dinner.

Findings also suggest that parents don’t have to be home all the time to be present in their children’s lives, but it helps to be home at certain times. And the best parental presence for a teenager may sometimes be like a potted (盆栽的) plant.

Many parents of teenagers have known this to be true and find ways to be present without trying to start a conversation. One friend of mine quietly does housework each evening in the sitting room where her teenagers watch TV. They enjoy each other’s company without the need to talk. Another friend usually accepts his daughter’s invitation to work or read nearby while she sits and does her homework. Perhaps, that, at least for some families, is the best way for a teenager and their parents to stay close.

In fact, many years of research suggest that children use their parents as a safe base (基地，大本营) from which to explore the world. Studies tell us that young children quietly follow their parents’ movements from room to room, even while going on with their own activities. Perhaps our teens, like babies, feel most at ease when their parents are still around. They don’t want to stay away from parents who allow them freedom.

A new school year is at hand, so as parents we could offer our teenagers a “potted flower”, as a gift, whose quiet and steady (稳定的) presence will give them a great day.