3 . Develop Positive Relationships

One of the most profound experiences we can have in our lives is the connection we have with other human beings. Positive and supportive relationships will help us to feel healthier, happier, and more satisfied with our lives.     1    

●Accept and celebrate differences.

    2     Yet when we try to build relationships, we expect that people will think like we do. In this way, it is so much easier to create a friendly relationship. However, while we may find it initially easier, the novelty of sameness soon would wear off. So accepting that we are all different is a great starting point.

●Listen effectively.

Listening is a crucial skill in boosting another person’s self-esteem.    3    In active listening, we also are genuinely interested in understanding what the other person is thinking, feeling, wanting, or what the message means, and we are active in checking out our understanding before we respond with our own new message. This process is what distinguishes active listening and makes it effective.

●    4    

In a world where time is of the essence, we don’t always have the time to give to our loved ones. Being present in the time you give to people is important. In other words, when you are with someone, you are truly with someone and not living in the past or worrying about the future. Devoting time, energy, and effort to building relationships is one of the most valuable life skills.

●Manage mobile technology.

By now, everyone has a mobile phone and many people have two or more. While they are a lifesaver in an emergency, and an effective tool for communication, they also can be a complete distraction when people exhibit a lack of mobile phone etiquette (礼仪).    5    

My job is just one of the essential jobs, a sanitation（卫生系统）engineer, not a glamorous one, but is considered the alternative. Of course, I never regard it as an ashamed task to be in my position. About the second week of the lockdown because of the Covid-19, I was having trouble finding a sanitizing spray（消毒喷雾）for my truck. The next morning on my way to work at 4 a. m., I stopped at one of the few stores which were open that early, hoping to purchase some. However, it was only open for the police and medical personnel. “Look at my vest please,” I begged to the clerk, “I’m not just buying it for myself.” “I’m more than sorry, sir. But this is just the regulation, and I really can’t help.” replied the smiling girl. As I turned to head back to my car with disappointment, I nearly broke down.

Coming out of the store, my stomach began to call for energy support. I stopped at a 7/11 and ordered an everything bagel（硬面包）with cream cheese to satisfy my poor stomach and my empty heart. It was toasty warm, and I couldn’t wait to dig in. But as I left the store with a little joy coming sweetly from the bagel, I noticed a scene that an old man was sitting at the bus stop, in rags. Knowing that it would probably be his only warm meal of the day, I gave him the bagel without any hesitation. Just when I was ready to turn around for another same bagel, something warming my heart came into being. Another customer, a gentle lady, from the 7/11 offered me half of her bagel. “We everyone should be taken care of at some certain moment.” she said with a tender sweet voice as I smiled to thank her sincerely. I was delighted because I realized that in one way or another, we were all looked after.

注意：续写词数应为150左右。

5 . “I’m sorry” are two very important words that play a big part in daily life. You might apologize while squeezing through a crowd or using the last of the printer paper at work. It’s easy to say “I’m sorry”, but true apologies are a different story.    1     Or you may wonder how to properly demand an apology if the other person is at fault? With the following tips, you’ll find these are not hard.

Apologize sincerely. A genuine apology can help repair your relationship, and even your reputation—you’re showing that you can be trusted to do what’s right. But your relationship will remain tense if your apology seems casual.    2    

Apply specific principles. A meaningful apology comes down to the three R’s- regret, responsibility and remedy (补救办法). Firstly, communicate your regret. Show the other person you have recognized your error and can relate to his/her pain. Then take complete responsibility.    3     Lastly, show that you’re working to improve the situation. Offer to make up for the harm you caused or promise you wouldn’t repeat it again.

    4    If you’re the offended (冒犯) party, describe what’s changed in the relationship and your true feeling. For example, you could say, “Although there’s a disagreement between you and me, I want us to be friends again. But I’ve been hurt, and I’d like an apology. I need you to acknowledge what you’ve done.”

Don’t expect immediate forgiveness. Most people hope for immediate forgiveness while apologizing, but that may mean you don’t respect the others’ emotions and all you care about is yourself.    5    After all, they were hurt and it would take them a while to recover.

6 . Feeling like we belong is a basic human necessity.     1     When we experience a sense of connection, it improves our motivation, health, and happiness. Connecting with others also helps us understand that everyone struggles and has difficult times. This helps us feel less alone.

A new study has found that a sense of belonging helps give a sense of meaning to our lives.     2     Studies have shown that people who feel life is meaningful are more likely to be in good psychological and physical health. On the contrary, people who feel life isn't meaningful are more likely to have psychological and physical problems.

If feeling like we belong helps give meaning to our lives, it is understandable that social rejection is painful.     3     It's part of human nature to find it difficult to accept those who are different from us.

    4     We may try to change our beliefs and behavior in order to fit in. This rarely works, though, as we then feel cut off from our true selves.

A sense of connection is so important to humans, but we live in a society where the importance of community is undervalued. Indeed, many media sources seem keen to stress what makes us different and divides us rather than brings us together. This means it is left to us to build a sense of community and belonging. Achieving this might not be easy.     5    

7 . When Sarah Harmeyer moved to Dallas, she didn't know any of her neighbors. So she offered to invite them all to dinner—and was thrilled when 91 people showed up in her backyard. For Harmeyer, it started with a simple desire to know others in her community. And the free Nextdoor neighborhood networking app made what could seem like a tough process easy.

"I went to the app and I said, 'If you've never stepped outside your house to meet your neighbors, would you consider coming? I would love to meet you, " she said. After she reached out, Harmeyer discovered others wanted to connect just as much as she did, if not more.

Since that first request, Harmeyer has now hosted gatherings with more than 3, 500 neighbors in total. She's had people over for backyard concerts, holiday parties and more. Harmeyer even shares hosting tips and tricks with others interested in becoming "people- gatherers” like her.

According to a recent survey, now half of Americans feel they can rely more on their neighbors and local community than before. 72% of Americans have made it more of a priority to support local businesses and 61 % now feel it's more important to build connections in the neighborhood than outside their community. Research also shows that a majority of people （58%） have a renewed appreciation of their neighborhood.

Whether it's by picking up groceries for a disabled neighbor, offering childcare, or sharing trusted information and recommendations— like which local pizza joint satisfies bellies most—neighbors are showing up for one another and are happy to do so.

Harmeyer's story illustrates how one person has the power to strengthen their entire neighborhood. Technology like Nextdoor can be used to facilitate real-world interactions— and, in turn, these gatherings can spark positive change.

"Something is extraordinary when we reach out to each other as neighbors, Harmeyer said.

8 . The most popular course at Yale is Psych 157: Psychology and the Good Life, covering the science of happiness and how to apply it. Since its launch in 2018 by Professor Laurie Santos, the course has been taken by a quarter of Yale students and more than 200,000 others in its online version.     1    

When chasing happiness, many of us are trying to be a little gentler with ourselves and assigning a priority to self-care. That’s a sensible strategy, Santos agrees. The trouble is how people understand self-care. We assume that self-care looks like a nice bubble bath - or even selfish pursuits.     2     We actually get more out of being more open, more social and more other-oriented (以他人为中心的) than spending money on ourselves.

Santos isn’t the only scientist insisting that you focus more on kindness to others than kindness to yourself. Research out of Oxford University confirms that even tiny acts of kindness can have significant effects on our happiness.     3     They boost mental well-being in the wider community. If you want to stay happy, focus less on self-indulgence (自我放纵) and more on kindness.

    4     Everyone has made a silly decision or two. I myself have lived and learned from more than a few. It’s not the mistakes that matter. It’s how we deal with them. What we can do is to learn from the poor choices, terrible ideas and bad decisions of the past and not repeat them. We can also learn from the mistakes of others and avoid them.     5     And we can make all the bumps and bruises (磕磕碰碰) count for something.

9 . No matter what profession or occupation you hold you will need to work with others to meet your goals. Group work is a great way to showcase your own skills while getting help from your teammates in areas where you might not be as strong.     1    

Clarify the team expectations so everyone is on the same page.     2     It’s likely that each teammate has a different idea about what’s expected of them, as well as what everyone else needs to be doing. It’s essential that the team discuss these expectations and agree on one universal list of expectations that everyone will follow.

    3     No one likes a teammate who barely contributes to the project. Take on an equal part of the work, and speak up if you realize you aren’t doing your fair share. Not only will your group mates appreciate your work ethic, it will show your supervisor or instructor that you’re a good team player.

Direct your concern toward the problem, not your teammates. Don’t accuse or blame anyone on your team for causing the conflict, even if you believe they did.     4     Have your team work through conflict, using it to their benefit.

Focus on the success of the group, not your personal success. When you’re on a team, everyone’s success depends on each member working toward a common goal.     5     Keep your focus on your team’s success, and your own success will follow.

10 . In daily life, there are many cases where we need to write a letter of apology. The following are some tips for writing a good letter of apology.

Acknowledge your mistakes. At the beginning of the letter, you have to state clearly what you have done.     1    Otherwise, things will become worse. If necessary, you can seek help from your parents or counselors.

Face the facts. Don't use indirect language.     2     This helps you sound sincere and shows that you are not trying to escape the blame. Otherwise the letter of apology will not carry any weight. Using “I” statements is better as they put the focus on you.

    3     When you are apologizing, it is easier to blame the situation. Don't try to do that. It will only worsen the situation. Don't explain yourself either, because this shows you don't treat the mistake seriously.

Make an apology sincerely. Even though there was a reason why you acted in a certain way, don't put it in the letter    4     Besides, your efforts to apologise will be in vain.

Keep your promises. It is quite easy to say what other people want to hear, but it will bring disappointment if you fail to keep your promises or if you keep repeating the mistakes.     5