2 . Four Qualities That Make You Attractive to Others

There is something many people gets wrong about attraction.     1     The reality is that attraction usually has more to do with personality characteristics than appearance. What follows are four qualities that can make you highly attractive to others.

Have control over your emotions(情绪). It’s not easy to always have control over your emotions. And people who do are extremely attractive. Have control over your emotions so that your emotions don’t control you. Allow yourself to think about what you’re going to say.     2    

Laugh at yourself. It’s not what happens to us that makes us feel stressed.     3     Every time you laugh at yourself, you decide to minimize something that could affect you negatively. Laughing at yourself is an attractive quality, as it means you don’t take yourself too seriously.

    4     When you show your warmth, people see you as respectful and friendly. Also, they see you as someone approachable. A warm person says hello to and cares about you after your long and tough day. This quality is important for you to build meaningful relationships.

Give plenty of space. The secret to long-lasting relationships is space, because time apart helps each partner recharge and bring positive energy into the relationship.     5     They don’t let others breathe. Instead, those who let others have their space when they need it are extremely attractive.

4 . There are many people out there who want to be “part of the crowd.” If you want to be the leader and stand out from the crowd instead, then this article is for you.

Be yourself and love yourself. In order to be as different as possible, you have to beyou — not a carbon copy of someone else. If you don’t know who you are, that process can seem a bit scary.    1    If you’re not comfortable with who you are, you’ll inevitably end up trying to be someone else.

Try new things. We are naturally raised as part of a group,    2    These thing are good — they can open us up to things we’re not even aware of—but it’s also important to try things that are brand new to you that other people haven’t already accepted.

    3    From a very young age, we’re sort of brainwashed to ft into our society. We wear clothes, go to school, do things to match our gender, and so on. It’s hard to realize that this is a box you can get out of. There are lines that you can color outside. It just hasn’t occurred to most of us.

Know the world works in opposites. Nothing is really as it seems. So many people are trying to be different, and it results in them all being the same! Being quiet may mean that when you talk, people hear you louder. When you’re not trying to attract that boy or girl, they become attracted to you.    4    

Know you’ll bump heads. Society isn’t super good at accepting what isn’t trendy. People are praised for being fashionable and pretty—few are praised for expanding our limits and coloring outside the lines.    5    Think of it as a good thing! By getting criticism, you’re doing something. You’re getting noticed. You’re exposing people to other things. You’re different.

5 . When I grew up and entered the ________ circles, I remember hearing my first boss say, “We all need to think like ________. ” But it didn’t completely ________. My dad never once said, “If you want to catch a fish you need to think like a fisherman. ”Years later, with great efforts to promote ________ services to people much older and richer than me, I came to ________ what we all need is to think more like customers.

6 . Personality is one of the most interesting ways in which people are different from one another. But where does our personality come from? Are we ________ with it or does it change as we get older? A great deal of research into personality indicates that people’s personalities are more or less ________ before they are born. However, not everyone is ________. Psychologist Sanjay Srivastava and a team of researchers from the University of California, Berkeley, have just completed a large-scale study into personality. The researchers evaluated data from 132, 515 adults aged between 21 and 60. The team focused on five personality traits—what scientists call “The Big Five”. These are:

1. Conscientiousness—how careful, thorough and self-disciplined are you?

2.________ —how considerate and helpful are you?

3. Neuroticism—how self-conscious and tense are you?

4. Openness—how ________ , imaginative and open to new experiences are you?

5. Extraversion—how sociable and energetic are you?

What they found contradicted long-held assumptions about ________ personalities are set. Conscientiousness, a trait marked by organization and discipline and linked to success at work and in relationships, was found to increase through the age ranges studied, with the most ________ occurring in a person’s twenties. Similarly, agreeableness, a trait associated with being warm, generous and helpful, contradicted the theory that personalities don’t change after the age of 30.________, people in the study showed the most change in agreeableness during their thirties and continued to improve through their sixties.

The changes in these two traits revealed in the study seem to ________ the experiences that people tend to have at certain stages of their lives. Common sense tells us that people become more responsible and conscientious as they ________ and become better at managing their jobs and relationships. Similarly, agreeableness changes most in people’s thirties when many of them are raising a family and take on the role of ________. Openness showed small ________ in both men and women over time, a change that indicates less interest in forming new relationships, and reflects the tendency we have as we get older to spend more time with a small group of well-known relatives and friends, and less time going out and meeting ________ people.

The personality traits were ________ consistent between men and women, except for neuroticism and extraversion, with young women scoring higher than young men in both. However, the difference in neuroticism is only apparent in youth and young adulthood, and the gap between men and women in both neuroticism and extraversion ________ as people age.

8 . While working as a graduate student in New York City, Vanessa Bohns was given the much ________ job of collecting survey data in Penn Station as part of an academic research project. Each time she________ a passer-by, she thought she would hear them tell her how________they were. Yet the bad responses rarely came; many more people were________to answer the questionnaires than she had ________.

Was it possible, she wondered, that most of us are________about whether people want to respond to our requests? Over the following decade, she________ multiple studies that confirmed this was indeed the________: in many different situations, people are often far more likely to ________than we assume.

________, it seemed that the results provided a refreshingly________view of human nature. “It started as a positive thing, like, isn’t it ________that people are more likely to do things for you than you think?” However, with time going by and more reflection on the results, Bohns has come to________ that her results reflect a broader tendency that we usually ________ how much influence our words can have over others, whether we’re asking them to________actions that are good or bad. People often________to do what they are asked because they find it too awkward to say no, even when they feel________with our requests.

Knowing this can help us understand how our requests might________other people — particularly in the workplace — and help us adjust our requests________ , in ways that respect people’s ________ and without taking what they have done for us for granted.

9 . How to be a good neighbour

Do you know your neighbors? Like really know them? Their Orel names, the types of cars they drive, what holidays they celebrate?

According to a 2021Pevv Research study, roughly a quarter of adults under 30 report that they don’t know any of their neighbors.     1     The following tips are both for young people and adults in room.

Get to know your neighbors.

It may seem obvious, but getting to know your neighbors is the first step to becoming a kind neighbor.     2     And if you feel comfortable, let them know that you’re there to help, if they ever need another hand.

    3    

It can feel so easy to just go home, close your door and turn on the TV without having to make small talk, but connecting with others is worth the effort. And if you take the first step, your small acts of kindness can encourage others to pay that kindness forward ——making even more people feel good.

Make small kind gestures a daily practice.

Another way to take care of your neighborhood is by making small acts of kindness a daily practice. Use the skills and resources available to you —maybe you aren’t a baker，but you have an amazing garden. You can ask your partner or kids to help you pick flowers from your garden to give your new neighbor a bouquet.     4    

Check your implicit bias (偏见).

    5     But remember to check your bias, and ask yourself why you feel uncomfortable and unsafe, rather than putting the blame on your neighbors.

Actions speak louder than words, and your attitudes towards marginalized and vulnerable people also set an example for your kids. So be mindful of the different people in your community and actively remind yourself to treat everyone with respect and care.