1 . I had just picked up my new car, a very beautiful automobile if you’re into cars. A few months later, I was involved in an accident. That new and very beautiful car was destroyed.

The accident was clearly not my fault. The other guy was so busy on his cell phone that he went right through a red light and slammed into the passenger side of my car. It was even scarier because my niece was asleep on the back seat and her father, my brother, was in the front passenger seat. He was not happy, to say the least.

The police arrived and began taking statements. I explained that I had been going at about 55kmph. “So you were going about 50kmph…” he said.

“No, I said I was doing about 55kmph” I said.

“Right, so you were doing about 50kmph…” again he repeated.

In a slightly annoyed(恼火的)tone because I felt I wasn’t being heard, I said: “No! I was doing about 55kmph!”

“OK, if that’s the way you want it,” this time the officer simply replied.

I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was shooting myself in the foot. My insurance company paid me for the damages to my car. However, I totally missed the boat on the other driver’s insurance company.

The city speed limit is 50kmph. I ended up getting 50 percent less than I would have from the other guy’s insurance company because I had insisted I was doing 55kmph.

It suddenly struck me that the traffic policeman had been trying to help me out. He hadn’t minded about the 5kmph; he had known something about the insurance that I had not.

I thought about what had happened again. I might have carried on insisting that I told the truth, but I could at least have said “Thank you” to him instead of acting so rudely. After all, he had been trying to help me out.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is to let other people talk while you simply shut up and listen. Never forget to hear, you have to be able to listen.

3 . Two of the saddest words in the English language are “if only”. I live my life with the goal of never having to say those words, because they express regret, lost opportunities, mistakes, and disappointment.

My father is famous in our family for saying, “Take the extra minute to do it right.” I always try to live by the “extra minute” rule. When my children were young and likely to cause accidents, I always thought about what I could do to avoid an “if only” moment, whether it was something minor like moving a cup full of hot coffee away from the edge of a counter, or something that required a little more work such as taping padding (衬垫) onto the sharp comers of a glass coffee table.

I don’t only avoid (避免) those “if only” moments when it comes to safety. it’s equally important to avoid “if only” in our personal relationships. We all know people who lost a loved one and regretted that they had foregone an opportunity to say, “I love you” or “I forgive you.” When my father announced he was going to the eye doctor across from my office on Good Friday, I told him that it was a holiday for my company and I wouldn’t be here. But then I thought about the fact that he’s 84 years old and I realized that I shouldn’t give up an opportunity to see him. I called him and told him I had decided to go to work on my day off after all.

I know there will still be occasions when I have to say “if only” about something, but my life is definitely better because of my policy of doing everything possible to avoid that eventuality (可能发生的事). And even though it takes an extra minute to do something right, or it occasionally takes an hour or two in my busy schedule to make a personal connection, I know that I’m doing the right thing. I’m buying myself peace of mind and that’s the best kind of insurance (保障) for my emotional well-being.

5 . My wife and I moved into our home two years ago. We had a yard with a lot of ________. Very often when we have flowers, Denise or I would plant some between the rocks, just to add some ________ to the area.

Last summer, I found a tiny little plant in the yard that I could not immediately identify. I knew I didn’t plant it and Denise said she didn’t either.

We decided to let it ________ growing until we could find out what it was.

Weeks passed and as I made my way back to the ________ plant, it appeared to be a sunflower. I decided to ________ the weeds (杂草) around it. As I pulled rocks from the area to get to the weeds, I noticed something ________.The sunflower had not ________ where I saw it begin. It actually had begun under a big rock and grown under and around it to reach the ________.

That’s when I ________ that if a tiny little sunflower didn’t let a big rock stand in its way of developing, we too have the ability of doing the same thing. If we ________ ourselves like that little sunflower, we can reach where we ________ to go and get what we need for growth.

We need to believe in ourselves knowing we have the ________ to achieve our goals. Like the sunflower, it knew it had the ability to get over the rocks because it had ________ in itself that it would succeed. Stand tall like the sunflower and be ________ of who and what we are, and then the environment will begin to ________ us. We will find a way to go under or around any “rocks” in order to reach our goals.

6 . On a Friday night, a poor young artist stood at the gate of the New York railway station, playing his violin. The music was so great that many people stopped to put some money into the hat of the young man.

The next day, the young artist came to the same place, and put his hat on the ground gracefully. Different from the day before, he took out a large piece of paper and laid it under his hat. Then he began to play the violin. It sounded more pleasant than ever.

Soon he was surrounded with people who were attracted by the words on that paper. It said, “Last night, a gentleman named George Sang put an important thing into my hat by mistake. Please come to get it soon.”

After about half an hour, a middle-aged man rushed through the crowd to the violinist and said, “Yes, it’s you. I knew that you were an honest man and would certainly come here.” The young violinist asked calmly, “Are you Mr George Sang?” The man nodded. The violinist asked, “Did you lose something?” “It’s a lottery ticket (彩票),” said the man. The violinist took out a lottery ticket and George Sang’s name was seen on it. “Is it?” he asked. George nodded and took the lottery ticket and kissed it, then danced with the violinist.

The violinist was a student at an arts college and had planned to attend advanced studies in Vienna. Later his classmate asked the violinist, “At that time you needed money to pay the tuition and you had to play the violin in the railway station every day to make money. Why didn’t you keep the lottery ticket for yourself?”

The violinist said, “Although I don’t have much money, I live happily. But if I lose honesty, I won’t be happy forever.” During our lives, we can gain a lot and lose so much. But being honest always be with us.

As a man was passing the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by the fact    1    these huge creatures were being held by only a thin rope tied to their front leg. No chains, no    2     (cage). It was obvious that the elephants could, at any time, break away from their bonds. But for some reason, they did not.

He saw a trainer nearby and asked why these elephants just stood there and made no attempt     3    (get) away. “Well,” the trainer said, “when they were very young and much     4     (small), we used the same size rope to tie them, and at that age, it was enough to hold them. As they grow up, they     5     (condition) to believe they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them,    6    they never try to break free.”

The man was amazed. These elephants could at any time break free from their bonds but because they     7     (believe) they couldn’t, they were stuck right where they were.

Like the elephants, how many of us go through life    8     (hang) onto the belief that we cannot do something,    9     (simple) because we failed in it once before?

    10     (fail) is part of learning. We should never give up the struggle in life.

9 . Get a Thorough Understanding of Oneself

In all one’s life time, it is oneself that one spends the most time being with or dealing with.     1    

When you are going upwards in life you tend to overestimate yourself. It seems that everything you seek for is within your reach.     2     It’s likely that you think it wise for yourself to stay away from the outer world. Actually, to get a thorough understanding of oneself, you may as well keep the following tips in mind.

Gain a correct view of oneself. You may look forward hopefully to the future but be sure not to expect too much, for dreams can never be fully realized. You may be courageous to meet challenges but it should be clear to you where to direct your efforts.     3    

Self-appreciate. Whether you compare yourself to a high mountain or a small stone, you represent a state of nature.     4     If you earnestly (诚挚地) admire yourself, you’ll have a real sense of self-appreciation.

    5     In time of anger, do yourself a favor by releasing it in a quiet place so that you won’t be hurt by its flames; in time of sadness, do yourself a favor by sharing it with your friends so as to change a bad mood into a cheerful one; in time of tiredness, do yourself a favor by getting a good sleep.

Get a full control of one’s life. Then one will find one’s life full of color and flavor.

10 . A month after Hurricane Katrina, I returned home in New Orleans. There lay my house, reduced to waist-high ruins, smelly and dirty.

Before the trip, I’d had my car fixed. When the office employee of the garage was writing up the bill, she noticed my Louisiana license plate. “You from New Orleans?” she asked. I said I was, “No charge,” she said, and firmly shook her head when I reached for my wallet. The next day I went for a haircut, and the same thing happened.

As my wife was studying in Florida, we decided to move there and tried to find a rental house that we could afford while also paying off a mortgage (抵押贷款) on our ruined house. We looked at many places, but none was satisfactory. We’d begun to accept that we’d have to live in extremely reduced circumstances for a while, when I got a very curious e-mail from a James Kennedy in California. He’d read some pieces I’d written about our sufferings for Slate, the online magazine, and wanted to give us (“no conditions attached”) a new house across the lake from New Orleans.

It sounded too good to be true, but I replied, thanking him for his exceptional generosity, that we had no plans to go back. Then a poet at the University of Florida offered to let his house to me while he went to England on his one-year paid leave. The rent was rather reasonable. I mentioned the poet’s offer to James Kennedy, and the next day he sent a check covering our entire rent for eight months.

Throughout this painful experience, the kindness of strangers has done much to bring back my faith in humanity. It’s almost worth losing your worldly possessions to be reminded that people are really nice when given half a chance.