1 . As children we are well-trained to find the right answer. We are rewarded for A's, the honor roll and acing the test. Our education trains us to follow the rules and deliver the expected answers. When we do, awards and congratulations follow. Yet when we grow up, it gets a little harder. Life and careers don’t have tests with an A if we get the “right” answer.

I recently had coffee with a college student who will graduate. She is struggling with what she wants for her career. She wants her parents to be proud of her and to continue the success she has had in school. She also talked about other students in her graduating class who are set to do "some big things," like working for impressive companies. Yet she wasn't sure of the right answer for using her degree. She said that deep down she was hoping that someone might give her the answer.

We both agreed that it comes down to not looking for the right answer, but her answer. The grown-up definition of the “right answer" is different than that in school. What would you do if you weren't afraid? It takes time to know these answers. And they can change over time and at any point in your career. My encouragement is to get valued advice and input, of course, but finally to look within yourself for the answers. It helps to come back to:

What do I want to be known for? What is my definition of success? What am I best at?

If I had no fears, what would I do?

What is one step I can take today to move me toward my goal (even if it's not perfectly clear)?

I find these types of questions are more helpful at getting to our unique answer rather than “right answer” questions, such as: What will my parents want? What degree or job will mark me as accomplished to the world? What is my best option based on where I work today?