1 . How many friends do you have? Not counting the hundreds on Facebook or the names gathering dust in your address book. But real friends, the ones cast in stone. The kind who would lend you $100 without asking why, or put you up if you were kicked out of your house.

Anthropologist Prof Robin Dunbar feels he can put a number on it: five. No matter how much of a social butterfly you are, you can count your real pals on one hand, he says. To that he says you can add an ideal number of 15 “good friends”, the kind of people you would see in a group and would join for a drink if you bumped into them in the pub, and up to 150 “meaningful contacts”.

Prof Dunbar’s latest research is an exact formula(公式) for friendship: new friendships take 34 hours of one-on-one time to form, in which you’d spend an ideal duration of three hours and four minutes per interaction together over the course of six months. Note that this is to turn an acquaintance into a friend, not one of the close friends that makes up your inner circle of five—to do that, you’d have to devote 90 hours, according to a 2018 University of Kansas study.

According to the experts, the pandemic years have changed the number and nature of our friendship. It gave people more grounds for disagreement: over adherence(遵守) to social-distancing rules, for example. Plenty of people lost relationships in the cracks. “We are always on the outlook for new and better friends, but lockdown has had a big effect in making people reevaluate,” says Dunbar. “Perhaps they’ve decided the time has come to part with some and therefore there’s an empty space to fill.”

The forecast for British friendship was already gloomy before the pandemic. Three million people said they feel lonely “often or always”, according to the Government’s 2019 community life survey. But the average British adult lost four friends over the course of the pandemic, according to the poll.

2 . Raising teenagers can be both difficult and rewarding(有回报的). They are becoming young adults. Almost all teenagers will have some behavioral outbursts(爆发) with their families during this period of life.     1     Here are some ideas that may create positive(积极的) experiences for teens and parents.

Have meals together. Mealtime is when we check in with each other.     2     Eating meals together offers a way for parents and kids to share what is on their minds. It brings families closer by creating trust and understanding to help guide children through the challenges of the teen years.

    3     As teens develop their own sense of independence, it gets harder to find time to talk. Talk in the car together, when doing dishes together, or any time you have a chance. Remember that no matter how big their problems seem, what most teens want is love and support. Help them connect with their families and communities. During these years, help teens learn that their words and actions mater.     4     Others may find connection through spiritual communities or from having more responsibilities at home. Connecting with families and communities also helps keep teens safe from riskier activity.

Find time to have fun together! What do you both enjoy? Playing chess? Going to the ballet? Volunteering in your community? Take time to have fun and enjoy each other’s company. No one wants the attention of people they love to be focused only on what not to do. This is true for teenagers, too.     5    

Five ways to make a great first impression (印象)! Researchers have discovered that, in general, it only takes seven seconds for a person to start making judgments about you when they first meet you. That’s why you should follow these useful tips on how to create a good first impression.

Before meeting someone, start thinking about the purpose of the meeting. Are you trying to impress them? For example, if you want to make new friends at a social event, you will want to appear friendly. And if you decide to run for class president at your school, you will need to appear confident.

Smiling is the most important thing you can do when meeting someone new. It shows that you’re friendly and makes people around you feel more comfortable. To have a winning smile, make sure your teeth are clean by brushing them every day.

Before you begin speaking, you will be judged on your body language. Therefore, it’s important to show trust in yourself by standing up tall and putting your shoulders back. Besides, if you uncross your arms, you will appear relaxed and friendly.

How you smell can influence people’s first impression of you. If you have a bad body smell, it will put people off. In short, aim to smell clean and avoid putting on a lot of scented products.

What you wear matters. While you should look clean and tidy, it’s also important to dress properly, whether you’re going to a birthday party or a sporting event. You should think about what your clothes say about you.

6 . My mother passed away when I was two. Two years later, I got a stepmom, Tina. I________to accept her and I didn’t treat her well. Somewhere inside me a________said, “She can’t take the________of Mom. She’s not my mom; she can’t tell me what to do.”

________I was about twelve, my father gave me a sudden awakening. One day, after I had been terribly ________to Tina, he took me aside and said something like, “Do you think that I’m the one who________your favorite foods, clothes and toys? Do you think that I plan________things like going to the movies, pool, and Kings Island? Well, I don’t. Tina is the one who does all those things. It’s time that you start________her with kindness.”

I was________shocked. Instantly (立刻), my heart was________guilt and shame. A________of thankfulness and love came over me. That day I ________calling her Mommy Tina. By the age of fourteen, I________the Tina and called her Mom.

Now, at age twenty-five, I’m writing this to show my love and________for her. I will always be________for this strong, beautiful woman who was brought into my life.

10 . Many people find it hard to say no, even when they are over-stressed, over-booked and just too busy to take on anything else.     1     . But it’s important to learn how to say no to people and their requests. Being unable can contribute to more stress, which may eventually turn to resentment (怨恨).

    2     . This article discusses some strategies you can use to set boundaries, protect your personal time and say no more often.

I’m sorry – I can’t do this right now

Sometimes, it helps to wait and think about whether you can take on a commitment. It’s usually best not to rush into things.     3     . Most reasonable people will accept this as an answer, so if someone keeps pressuring you, they’re being rude.

Let me think about it

If you’re uncomfortable being firm or are dealing with pushy people, it’s OK to say, “Let me think about it and get back to you.”     4     .

This strategy also allows you to think about whether you want to say “yes” to another commitment. To decide, do a cost-benefit analysis and then get back to them with a yes or no.

    5    

If you would really like to do what they’re requesting, but don’t have the time, it’s fine to say no to all or part of the request but mention a lesser commitment that you can make. This way you’ll still be partially involved, but it will be on your own terms.