1 . As people hold different views on almost anything, we live in a judgmental world where people are quick to point out the faults and imperfections of others, yet seem unaware of their own. Some misguided souls believe they have a duty to help you to be a better person by telling you what a failure you really are first and then offering suggestions as to how you can improve.
So what is the possible solution to criticism?
If you are the one forcing others to feel ashamed of themselves, STOP. Make a conscious decision rather than focus on the negative aspect of a person’s performance or attitudes. You are more likely to offer helpful suggestions from the beginning. If you are on the receiving end of criticism, the “OK” response is a perfect solution. When someone comments negatively on a task you are doing or a personality issue of yours, a natural response is to defend and attack. However, this approach is rarely effective as it puts both parties on the defensive. Instead, simply reply with “OK”. This brief one-word response acknowledges the other person’s comment without agreeing with it or feeling necessary to engage in a debate about it.
It is important to remain emotionally attached to what the other person is saying, to listen without feeling, to be an objective observer. In fact, there is much that one can learn from a negative review. You can ask yourself: Did I make a mistake? Could I have done better? Did I give 100% of myself to the task at hand? If so, how can I improve myself? As for chronic(习惯性的) criticizers: It is important to set strict boundary with them. Remove yourself from their presence when necessary.
In any case, one can learn to be “OK” with criticism and not allow it to negatively impact your life or relationship with the other party.
1. What may the author think of people who prefer to judge others?A.Warm-hearted. | B.Self-centered. | C.Talkative. | D.Responsible. |
A.He thinks the suggestions are helpful. |
B.He defenses himself with the response. |
C.He agrees with the comments completely. |
D.He wants to avoid unnecessary arguments. |
A.Having debates. | B.Accepting criticism. |
C.Keeping calm. | D.Avoiding criticizers. |
A.To make a judgment on others. | B.To explain some social behavior. |
C.To call for action against attack. | D.To give advice on facing criticism. |
2 . What are the speakers mainly talking about?
A.How to treat others. | B.How to support a family. | C.How to find a great job. |
1. What will Edward be responsible for?
A.Doing online marketing. | B.Organizing the musicians. | C.Sending out the invitations. |
A.Draw the posters. | B.Make the guest list. | C.Design the invitations. |
A.Nancy. | B.John. | C.Tim. |
A.In a hotel. | B.On a train. | C.In the hospital. |
4 . A few years ago, I walked into Panera and placed my order. As I sat down, I noticed that at the table next to me, there was an older man with a cap eating his soup alone. At the sight of this, a feeling of sadness began to wash over me. Why was he eating alone? Was he lonely? Did he want someone to keep him company?
This wasn’t the first time I’d felt sad when I noticed someone eating alone. I automatically assume they’re lonely and need someone to be there for them. For some reason, eating with other people is the norm. Modern society has evolved to the point where most people eat with others and do almost every activity together. If we need to get lunch before a class, we’d rather ask around to see if someone will come with us. But is it possible we just don’t want to appear lonely?
For me, it’s easy to get pressured to have to be around other people when I see everyone else around me accompanied by a friend almost all the time. So many people are always around someone else, and that may make people think we always need someone with us to feel better about ourselves.
But that’s not true. We can enjoy being alone not everyone needs to be constantly surrounded by friends to be happy. And we shouldn’t be afraid to eat alone if that’s what we want to do. We don’t have to do what everyone else does.
Ultimately, I don’t think I’ll ever not get sad if I see someone eating alone, but I’ll bear in mind that maybe they just want a break from the world, or maybe they prefer it that way. It’s important to realize seeing someone doing something alone doesn’t always mean they’re lonely.
1. Why does the author mention her experience at Panera a few years ago?A.To introduce the topic of caring for old people. |
B.To start the discussion about people eating alone. |
C.To describe a memorable encounter. |
D.To illustrate the benefits of eating alone outside. |
A.It is a good way to avoid awkwardness. |
B.It helps maintain social connections. |
C.It is common but deserves questioning. |
D.It is unreasonable and unacceptable. |
A.Uncomfortable. | B.Isolated. | C.Envious. | D.Relaxed. |
A.Social relationships are unnecessary. |
B.People need to be alone to recharge. |
C.Loneliness is unavoidable in our daily life. |
D.Being alone doesn’t equate to loneliness. |
5 . The Power of Peers
Do birds of a feather really flock together? People do tend to choose friends who are similar to them. Many behaviors spread socially. Activities in certain brain areas change when other people are around.
A research shows that even just having another peer around can change the reward response in the brain and also the risk-taking tendencies of teenagers. Some people seem to be more easily influenced than others and more sensitive to feeling included or excluded by others.
It’s the quality of friendships — not quantity — that really makes the difference. Friendships you feel you want to let go of may be low quality.
Spending time with friends can be especially helpful for people. Noticing that our behavior is influenced by other people, we can be intentional and try to focus on the people who are doing the things we want to get into ourselves.
A.Adolescence is such a risky period. |
B.That can affect what you choose to do. |
C.Peer pressure can sometimes lead to competition. |
D.People care about what others think across all different age groups. |
E.They are linked to poor academic performance and behavioral issues. |
F.Sharing your healthy habits could also make a real difference to others. |
G.The number of friends you have determines your level of social influence. |
6 . How to Deal with Nosy (好管闲的) People
Nosy people are everywhere. They are just too much for us to tolerate. However, no matter what type of nosy people you meet, there are ways you can use to get out of the situation.
Respond. Do not react.
When someone starts asking personal questions one after another, you might get confused as to why. When you find yourself in this situation, remind yourself to slow down.
Answer them reasonably without showing too much.
One great way is to give a satisfactory answer without saying too many details. This way, you will satisfy their curiosity and keep your personal boundaries (界线) .
Sometimes, you just don’t feel like answering the other person’s questions. It could be because they have no business knowing the details. It could also be that they are rude. So, if someone asks you a personal question, you could politely decline to answer by saying, “Sorry, but I am not comfortable discussing my private matters like this.”
Show a lack of enthusiasm.
Your body language tells a lot about you. It tells other people whether you are interested in talking to them, whether you are having a good time and so on. So, if you want to communicate that you don’t appreciate them being nosy, you can do so with your body language. How do you do this? Easy! Just show a lack of enthusiasm.
A.Avoid talking with them. |
B.Politely decline to answer. |
C.So, give yourself time to react. |
D.There is no need to feel rushed at all! |
E.Use this way when the other person is a loved one. |
F.Give brief answers and don’t look them in the eye too much. |
G.Follow the ones below and you will find it easy to deal with them. |
7 . A therapy (治疗) client and I are working on an eating disorder and find it originated from a relationship break-up or perhaps being bullied in middle school. Such hurtful experiences led to not eating for a couple of weeks. Then comes a high praise from a friend that totally backfires. Maybe it’s an enthusiastic, “Wow, you look great!’’ In a flash, this praise excites an inner and often unconscious thought: “Oh, people care more about me if I lose weight. So many things feel out of control but I can control people’s affection by not eating.”
Often, very well-intentioned individuals offer praise out of a desire to uplift and connect. Such praise is often tied, directly or indirectly, to a person’s relationship with the standards of a specific group or institution. Sadly, such praise can easily reduce an individual’s dignity to their level in line with the group’s expectations rather than supporting their inherent (固有的) dignity and worth. So, what’s a better way?
One answer is to exit the game of “right and wrong” and enter a more life-giving focus on what needs are present. Returning to our example above, when you see that someone has lost weight and you want to give them a praise, just pause and take a deep breath. Simply ask, “How are you doing?” See them and hear them. Appreciate them as a person of limitless value. Know there may be much more to their inner world than meets the eye. Similarly, when you see someone’s success in school, appreciate the hard work they put into it. Ask with gentle curiosity, “How’s it been for you?” Listen with your full attention that in itself can be a rare gift in today’s hustle and bustle world.
By maintaining your concern and listening to the ways they want to be accompanied and supported — even when it might not be your first instinct — you can see them as a whole person, with complex feelings, very human needs, and inherent dignity.
1. What does the underlined word “backfires” in paragraph 1 refer to?A.Improves the situation. | B.Shows sincere concern. |
C.Removes hurtful feelings. | D.Produces an unexpected result. |
A.Analyzing the phenomenon. | B.Listing another example. |
C.Presenting the solution. | D.Making a proposal. |
A.To start a light conversation. |
B.To focus on one’s inner needs. |
C.To explore the secret of keeping slim. |
D.To show appreciation for one’s efforts. |
A.Say No to the “Right or Wrong” Game |
B.Why We Need to Make Praises to Others. |
C.Follow Me and Be a Qualified Therapist |
D.How Innocent Words can Be Harmful |
8 . It’s a great feeling when someone gives you a compliment (赞美), isn’t it?
When someone does an activity or a task particularly well, let him/her know about it by saying “You did a great job!”
When you’ve bought something new, it feels great when other people are excited about it. For example, if you take out your new mobile phone and a colleague says, “What a cool phone!”, it makes you feel like you made the right decision to buy it.
Compliment someone on their personalities and you'll make a new friend. For example, if you like how happy a coworker is, you can tell him/her, “You are always so happy. It makes my day better.”
A.It’s a useful way to start a conversation, too. |
B.Everyone likes compliments about their appearance. |
C.Be careful with compliments about appearance, though. |
D.So, try giving someone a compliment and see their reaction. |
E.Return the favor by complimenting others on nice things they own. |
F.To make the compliment more meaningful, make it more specific. |
G.Use compliments like this for any quality that you appreciate in a person. |
9 . No matter how friendly your tone is or how honey sweet you are in a conversation, when you use one of these two words (or both) in your sentences, the message to your conversation companion is “You are wrong”.
These words don’t say, “Let’s discuss this” or “I’d love to hear what you think about this” to people. They say, “You are wrong and I am right.” If your conversation companion is also eager to win at any cost, you will have a potential battle on your hands. The result?
Are you interested in a little test to see how competitive your co-workers are? Try this. For one week, keep a scorecard of how many times each person uses “no” or “but”.
If this is your interpersonal challenge, you can do this little test for yourself just as easily as you can to judge your co-workers. Stop trying to defend your position and start monitoring how many times you begin remarks with “no” or “but”.
A.I use this technique with my clients. |
B.Why do people like to say these two words? |
C.What are these conversation stopping words? |
D.Nothing more can happen that will be productive. |
E.It’s human nature to like being accepted and recognized. |
F.You will be shocked at how frequently these words are used. |
G.Pay close attention to when you use these words in sentences. |
10 . What if your next job is just a weak tie away? A recent study, conducted by a team from Stanford University and LinkedIn, revealed that weaker social connections have a greater beneficial effect on job mobility (流动性) than stronger ties. Stanford Professor Erik Bryson suggests a practical outcome of this study is to encourage job seekers to expand their reach beyond immediate friends and colleagues. Weak ties, he explains, often provide more unique, beneficial information and connections.
The advantage of weak ties theory is based on the idea that weak ties allow distant group of people to access novel information that can lead to new opportunities and innovation. Weak ties are more likely to introduce new job information to a wider social network.
The research team conducted a five-year experimental study with LinkedIn, involving 20 million global participants and 600,000 new jobs created. Using LinkedIn’s “People You May Know” (PYMK) algorithm (算法), the researchers tested the weak tie theory’s impact on the job market. The team randomly assigned LinkedIn users to receive either more weak or strong tie recommendations from the PYMK algorithm, then tracked the labor mobility of these groups over five years.
Their findings confirm that weaker ties enhance job mobility. Besides, the researchers looked at differences across industries and found that adding weak ties creates significantly more job opportunities in digital and high-tech industries. “This may reflect the fact that there is more rapid change and need for novel information and connections in those industries,” Bryson said.
He points out that the traditional methods used by policymakers to analyze labor markets are quickly becoming outdated. “They need to recognize that the labor market, like all aspects of the economy, is being digitized,” Bryson said. “It is important that we understand how the algorithms used by digital platforms like LinkedIn impact the labor market.”
1. According to paragraph 1, what should job seekers do?A.Expand network to include weak ties. | B.Limit the search to their current industry. |
C.Strengthen connections with close friends. | D.Rely on strong connections for opportunities. |
A.By carrying out on line surveys. | B.By interviewing LinkedIn employers. |
C.By tracking user data and job mobility. | D.By conducting a large-scale job fair. |
A.They are fast-paced and value novelty. | B.They cause weak ties among employees. |
C.Strong ties are the main source of mobility. | D.Weak ties do not contribute to job mobility. |
A.Prioritize traditional methods only. | B.Ignore the impact of digital platforms. |
C.Recognize the influence of digitization. | D.Understand the rules on digital platforms. |