2 . As our lives become more closely connected with the digital age, it’s more important than ever to keep the spark of human connections, a key part of which is making small talk.     1     Here’s how to master the art of small talk.

The cornerstone of effective small talk lies in developing genuine interest. Genuine interest is about actively seeking to understand the other person, valuing their perspectives and appreciating the uniqueness they bring to the conversation.     2    

Small talk extends beyond spoken words; it includes the art of observation. As you engage in conversation, pay attention to the speaker’s body language, facial expressions and tone of voice.     3     Being familiar with them not only helps you navigate the conversation with sensitivity but also enables you to establish a deeper connection by respecting the slight differences of the other person’s communication style.

Actually listening and connecting with someone is essential for a conversation. By providing your undivided attention, you convey respect and interest in what the other person has to say.     4     Ask follow-up questions to show that you value their insights. This depth of engagement lays the foundation for a more meaningful connection.

At the heart of successful small talk lies the authenticity (真实性) of your engagement. Authenticity fosters a sense of trust and connection, making the conversation more meaningful and memorable. Avoid the temptation to project an image or use scripted responses.     5     In the world of small talk, authenticity is the key that unlocks the door to deeper connections and more fulfilling interactions.

5 . How To Stop Bein g A People Pleaser

As a recovering people pleaser, I spent much of my life keeping others happy. Breaking this habit meant stepping on a few toes. However, I’ve become a happier person as a result. Here are some tips I used to stop being a people pleaser.

Identify your priorities. Take a moment to think about why you are trying to learn how to stop being a people pleaser.     1     Why do you feel the need to keep them happy? Answering these questions will help you set a goal that you can hold yourself accountable to.

Just say “no”. One reason why people pleasers say “yes” to everything is that they fear disappointing others.     2     If you are a people pleaser, you are likely to spend lots of energy trying to control how people feel about you. The best thing you can do is let them feel their feelings. It will feel liberating to free yourself from being responsible for someone else’s reaction.

    3     Saying “no” is a good way to set better boundaries in your important relationships. All healthy relationships have their own boundaries. If you haven’t set boundaries in your relationships, the odds are that at some point you will end up feeling pressured to do something you don’t want to do.

Accept yourself. Many people pleasers are insecure about who they are.     4     Check out our summary of Brené Brown’s the Gifts of Imperfection to learn how to accept your imperfections and love yourself.

Remember that you cannot please everyone. No matter what you do there will always be someone who is unhappy with your choices.     5    

6 . Saying “thank you” when you receive an unexpected gift is all well and good, but how can you get a little creative with your appreciation? As it turns out, there are plenty of ways to express your gratitude to others while remaining gracious and sincere.     1    . We’ll show you how to say thank you in exciting and meaningful ways!

I appreciate this.     2    . A great “thank you” involves expressing appreciation for the gift and explaining why you’re grateful. For added value, you can even describe what you’ll do with their gifts if you have an idea.

You’ve made my day! Show them that their gifts turned your day around. Telling someone that they made your day will make the giver feel that their gifts are much more meaningful and worthwhile.     3     .

It’s like you read my mind! Thank you. Compliment (恭维) their gift-giving skills.     4     , it can be likely that they really know you and are anticipating your needs without having to ask you what you want! Show them how touched you are by letting them know that their gifts are exactly what you want.

    5    . Show them how surprised you are. If someone goes out of their way to give you an unexpected gift, make sure they know they succeeded in their mission to surprise and delight you. Say “thanks” and express your shock at the same time. For example, you should have seen me; my eyes almost popped out of my head! Thank you for the lovely surprise.

8 . Tips for Being a Good Coworker

A good coworker, who is willing to help his team succeed and meet the company’s goals, tends to have more opportunities to grow with his company.     1    . Follow these tips below, if you want to become a better teammate.

Practise active listening

When your coworkers feel like you pay attention to what they have to say, you are showing them respect. People like feeling that what they say is important and valuable. By practising active listening, you can show your coworkers that you are understanding them.     2    .

Offer support to a coworker in need

    3    . You could offer to take on some of his work or simply be someone he can talk to. Listen to his problems and try to think of solutions to help him overcome the challenges.

    4    

Rather than discussing depressing topics, keep conversations light and fun at work. Or talk about things like your hobbies, family, pets or upcoming activities. Make an effort to look on the bright side of things and influence others to do the same.

Get to know your colleagues

The more you get to know your coworkers, the better you may become at cooperating with them. One way to do this is through employee bonding.    5    . Likewise, you could also organize an employee game night.

9 . It is so easy to just go home and shut your door without getting to know your neighbors. But being an active neighbor will turn your living place into a kinder and more caring neighborhood.

    1    . You don’t have to show up with a fresh apple pie or anything like that. It’s truly as simple as saying hello, introducing yourself and asking a few open-ended questions. But they are the first step to becoming a kind neighbor.

Then get out of your comfort zone and make efforts to know more about your neighbors.     2    . And if you feel comfortable, let them know that you’re there to help, if they ever need another hand.

Another way to show your neighbors that you care is by making your small acts of kindness a regular practice. This can be cleaning up the litter or even cleaning up after the pets have made a mess on your block.     3    , you can ask your partner or kids to pick a bunch of flowers from the garden to give your new neighbor.     4    .

Remind yourself that being connected feels good and boosts your mood in the long run. If you take the first step, your small acts of kindness can encourage others to pay that kindness forward.     5    . Challenging as they are, reaching out to your neighbors is worth the efforts.

10 . I am a psychologist. Kate, a former client who I had helped, got a promotion recently. She came into my_________. I expected our conversation would be about her success._________, Kate mentioned she had a simple but serious problem—-she wasn’t getting along well with another manager called Mary. The two didn’t _________each other from the beginning, and as time passed things weren’t getting any better. Kate told me that it was becoming painfully clear that her inability to get on with Mary was going to block her success, and _________ ruin her career at the company.

As Kate and I _________ the situation, she told me Mary was seen as a highly talented and well-liked manager. But Kate believed that they had different _________, and Mary made her _________. I suggested Kate revisit their shared work. It was then that Kate realized Mary’s teamwork was important for getting the business _________ they all wanted. In measuring the relationship more honestly, Kate realized she’d been failing to _________ with Mary in positive ways. She hadn’t made Mary feel her efforts were valuable, and had more or less been trying to __________ her.

So Kate decided to __________ herself. She thought about the cause of the situation and how she responded to it. She reminded herself, “I won’t get along with everyone but there is possible__________ in every interaction with others. I can and should learn from almost everyone I meet.” Later Kate and Mary’s relationship greatly __________. Now they communicate frequently in person and join in each other’s team meetings. Take an honest look at what’s __________ the tension. Maybe your __________ to the situation is at the center of the problem.