2 . Social anxiety(社恐) is a men tal disorder that is often misunderstood. It involves being fearful of social situations, especially unfamiliar ones.     1    

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A person with social anxiety has an increase in heart rate, sweating and dizziness(头晕). In all of these cases, it’s important to slow down your breathing to help you gain control back of your body.

Challenge your thoughts

When you have social anxiety, perhaps you’re worried you might trip over, laugh or cough at the wrong time.     3     They may cause discomfort, but try to challenge these worries and replace them with more helpful thoughts.

Set goals

The idea of goal setting is not only to decide where you want to end up, but to learn about where you are now.     4     Never compare yourself to others in terms of social success. Focus on yourself and how you are doing week by week, month by month.

Say yes

    5     But it’s time to start saying “yes”! If you're invited to do something social, don’t turn it down and accept the invitation. You may feel a little anxious at first. However, over time , the more you attend social activities, the less scared you will feel to go.

3 . Miscommunications can sometimes be funny, however, most of time you will feel frustrated or upset. Put some efforts into your conversations, and you can lower your risk of miscommunicating.

    1     Thinking about your words allows you to organize your thoughts and prepare to say something meaningful. Especially if you’re about to have an important conversation, make sure your words are organized so that you can say what you mean.

Get people’s attention. It means making sure they are listening to and understanding the words you say. Make eye contact and check to make sure they are listening. If the other person is distracted or in the middle of doing something else, say that you’ll talk later when he or she is more available.     2    

Listen closely.     3     Instead of trying to think about what they will say next, just stay engaged with the person who is speaking.     4     One of the best ways to do this is through actively listening. Turn your body toward them and lean in. Don’t turn to distractions, like cell phones.

Avoid interrupting. If someone else is speaking, do your best not to interrupt them.     5    This shows that you’re listening and you care about what they are saying. If you tend to interrupt people often, they may feel frustrated in talking to you and may not communicate all they wish to say.

4 . Meeting people is the first step to make friends.     1     Here are some useful tips.

Small talk can make people feel false and meaningless.     2     By making small talk, you show that you’re friendly and open to communicating. In that way, small talk helps you to make the first connection with potential (潜在的) new friends. If someone doesn’t make any small talk, we might think that they don’t want to make friends with us, that they don’t like us, or that they’re in a bad mood.

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When you talk to someone new and realize that you have similar interests, the conversation usually goes from stiff (生硬的) to fun and interesting. Therefore, make it a habit to find out if you have any mutual interests or something in common. You can do this by mentioning things that interest you and seeing how they answer.

Don’t judge people too quickly. Try not to think that they are shallow (肤浅的), boring, or that you have nothing to talk about. If everyone seems uninterested, it might be because you have been in small talk.     4    

When you try to make people like you, it will become easier for you to make friends.     5     If we are with someone with a positive experience, we like that person more.

6 . Being a good listener is important for a number of reasons. When you are at work, it can make you better understand your tasks and what your boss expects from you.     1     You can see the world through the eyes of others.

• Give the speaker your full attention,     3     Once you talk face to face, you need to keep your mind quiet, and pay attention to what the other person is saying.

• Don’t cut in. Many people have a habit of cutting in and giving out quick opinions before people finish what they are speaking. That’s impolite.     4    .

•    5     Not everyone is a talented speaker. Some people take longer time to share their points.“ It sounds great!” “What happened next?” These are useful for keeping the sharing going on.

It takes time to be a good listener. You can’t be perfect at one night. Keep trying every day to put the above advice into practice.

Five ways to make a great first impression (印象)! Researchers have discovered that, in general, it only takes seven seconds for a person to start making judgments about you when they first meet you. That’s why you should follow these useful tips on how to create a good first impression.

Before meeting someone, start thinking about the purpose of the meeting. Are you trying to impress them? For example, if you want to make new friends at a social event, you will want to appear friendly. And if you decide to run for class president at your school, you will need to appear confident.

Smiling is the most important thing you can do when meeting someone new. It shows that you’re friendly and makes people around you feel more comfortable. To have a winning smile, make sure your teeth are clean by brushing them every day.

Before you begin speaking, you will be judged on your body language. Therefore, it’s important to show trust in yourself by standing up tall and putting your shoulders back. Besides, if you uncross your arms, you will appear relaxed and friendly.

How you smell can influence people’s first impression of you. If you have a bad body smell, it will put people off. In short, aim to smell clean and avoid putting on a lot of scented products.

What you wear matters. While you should look clean and tidy, it’s also important to dress properly, whether you’re going to a birthday party or a sporting event. You should think about what your clothes say about you.

10 . Many people find it hard to say no, even when they are over-stressed, over-booked and just too busy to take on anything else.     1     . But it’s important to learn how to say no to people and their requests. Being unable can contribute to more stress, which may eventually turn to resentment (怨恨).

    2     . This article discusses some strategies you can use to set boundaries, protect your personal time and say no more often.

I’m sorry – I can’t do this right now

Sometimes, it helps to wait and think about whether you can take on a commitment. It’s usually best not to rush into things.     3     . Most reasonable people will accept this as an answer, so if someone keeps pressuring you, they’re being rude.

Let me think about it

If you’re uncomfortable being firm or are dealing with pushy people, it’s OK to say, “Let me think about it and get back to you.”     4     .

This strategy also allows you to think about whether you want to say “yes” to another commitment. To decide, do a cost-benefit analysis and then get back to them with a yes or no.

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If you would really like to do what they’re requesting, but don’t have the time, it’s fine to say no to all or part of the request but mention a lesser commitment that you can make. This way you’ll still be partially involved, but it will be on your own terms.